Stupid thing to Say
by the Prince's Jewel
Summary: Hey, you really care for Goku, don't you? I have an idea. Let's trade mates!
1. let's trade mates

Heh, I just had to pull this. That stupid comment of Chi-Chi's and it put a bug in my brain. Now, I can't decide. Should this be a one-shot, or should it continue? It would do good either way… I think.

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Bulma watched Goku playing with the boys, her mind a jumble of memories. Their first meeting, his first bath. Swimming parties, tournaments, and all the crazy things they'd done and dealt with on their dragon ball searches. The tournaments, his wedding. Finding out he was a Saiyan, learning he'd died. Going to Namek, that horrible dream where Vegeta had been trying to kill her, and then actually meeting the temperamental Saiyan.

Goku's almost unfailing happiness, Vegeta's never-failing moodiness. Constant smile and constant scowl. And yet, she'd fallen for the shorter Saiyan, and fallen hard. Her gaze drifted to him. He stood apart from the others, staring out the window. He looked little different than he had when they'd first met. Oh, more defined, more chiseled, a little older, but he hadn't changed much. He even still watched the stars, straining to see the faint light that had once been his home.

She looked back at Goku. He had never cared that he had been born a Saiyan, or that his home planet had been destroyed. He'd lost all memories of such very shortly after he'd arrived on Earth, and considered himself an Earthling. He never made any bones about not caring much about his old race, in spite of Vegeta constantly trying to instruct him in the ways of a true Saiyan. A fond smile crossed her lips, if Goku recalled any of what Vegeta told him, it was probably fighting styles or techniques.

Bulma glanced at Chi-Chi, then followed her husband's gaze out the window. Yes, the stars, as she'd thought. She wondered if anyone had ever told Chi-Chi what Goku had said on the Kai world, then grinned. No, Goku was still alive and in one piece.

"What's so funny?"

"EEEP! Oh, Yamcha! Don't sneak up on a girl like that?"

"Why not? Most girls like having me sneak up on them."

"Very funny."

He laughed. "Come on, Bulma. You don't seem to be enjoying yourself much. Maybe you need some more food."

"Not me. I don't have a Saiyan's appetite!" But she agreed to dance with him, and chatted easily with him as they danced.

Vegeta stared out the window, looking for the faint red light of his destroyed home world. The dim lighting of the party made it harder to see outside, but he didn't allow that to hinder the search. The slightest of smiles crossed his face, a sad regret lingering in his eyes as he found it.

Home.

He missed it, for all that he had been taken away very young, for all that it had been destroyed before he had ever had a chance to return. True, he had a new home, a new family, and even a fellow Saiyan to fight with. Yet still…. He shook his head, fighting off the melancholy.

He turned from the window, his gaze roving over the revitalized party. Goku had arrived, and those who had planned to leave had stayed, instead. _"Come on, Bulma. The king wants his dinner."_

The king. He turned again to the window. King. His eyes sought the red star that shone so faintly, the light of his dead world. King Vegeta, he would have been, just as his father had been. King of the Saiyans. The Prince of all Saiyans, that was what he called himself. A lie. A lie, and he knew it. There was only one other Saiyan, and that one did not call him Prince or King, did not consider him as a prince or a king, merely a friend and convenient sparring partner.

Goku paused in the act of taking a bite out of the latest drumstick he held, having decided a snack was in order. "Fwt!!!" He swallowed hastily. "She didn't!"

"Uh-hu, Daddy. She said he wasn't as sweet, but he was more dependable," Goten replied earnestly.

"Oh wow. Gee, I must've made her a lot madder than I thought." Goku shot a look at his wife, laughing at something 18 had said. She didn't _look_ mad, but she'd sure yelled at him when he'd got here. He finished off the drumstick, managing to tickle both boys at the same time. They shrieked, and took off running.

__

Man, did I really make her that mad? Mad enough she'd trade me for Vegeta? But, she hates Vegeta. I thought_ she hated Vegeta. She gripes about him more than she does about me… and I _live_ with her. Oh, man, what if she meant it? What if she really doesn't want me around anymore? It's not like I've really been there for her._

Already wide eyes widened a bit further. _Ah, man, I _haven't_ been there for her. When I was alive, I was always off fighting someone, or training for a tournament, or just training for fun. And I couldn't _be_ here at all while I was dead, and the one time I did come back, I was fighting instead of spending time with her._ Goku felt sick suddenly. _ She must mean it. Cause I haven't changed at all. I'm still not here for her, even though I'm alive again._

He got up from the table, walking slowly through the room. Krillen and Oolong both talked with him for awhile, and he knew he was saying something to them, but he was so frozen he didn't know what he said. His smile was firmly in place, laughing just like always. Roshi joined them, raving on about some new magazine, and he excused himself from the conversation. 

He found himself out in the garden, where the stereo played. Gohan and Videl were dancing, Yamcha and Bulma. Goku's smile slipped slightly, but he recovered quickly. The song ended, he asked Bulma for the next dance. Yamcha laughed and released her, heading back inside to talk with Krillen.

"Hey."

"Hey yourself. Wasn't the last time we danced at your wedding?" Bulma adjusted his hands for him, he didn't seem to know what to do with them. "You still don't know how to dance well, do you?"

"Ah, no, not really. Like this?" He began moving, taking care not to step on her toes.

"How about I lead instead?"

"Sure."

"You don't sound happy to be dancing with me, Goku," she teased.

"Chi-Chi… wanted to trade me…" he whispered.

She looked up, a little surprised that he knew. He still smiled, but his eyes were full of agony. "Oh, Goku, she was just teasing. You shouldn't take that seriously."

"Are you sure?"

He sounded so uncertain that she stopped dancing, and pulled him outside. "Goku, what is wrong with you? Of course she was just teasing. You don't seriously believe that Chi-Chi would ever really want to live with Vegeta, do you? I mean, think about it!"

"I did." He sank onto one of the garden benches. "I did. I think she meant it. I really do."

Bulma sat beside him, cupping his face with one hand. Her other settled lightly over one of his. "Goku, there is no way Chi-Chi meant what she said. She wouldn't be able to tolerate Vegeta's attitude for more than an hour, and we both know it. She thinks he's arrogant, mean, full of himself, bossy, selfish, and unbelievably rude."

"I know. But he's dependable." A single tear brimmed and fell. "I'm not. I know I'm not."

"You help with the chores. Vegeta doesn't. Ever." Her tone was slightly bitter. "How long would she put up with that?"

"She's used to it, Bulma. I was always gone. Fighting, or dead, or training. I'm always gone."

"No, Goku. You spend more time with Chi-Chi than Vegeta does with me. She loves you. She won't trade you for him, not now, not ever. Stop worrying about it. She was just mad, she didn't mean it."

"But why? How did I make her so mad? What did I do?"

"It's what you didn't do, Goku." Bulma sighed, her thumb brushing gently, comfortingly, along his face. "You were supposed to come with her to the party. You were supposed to be there. And you were off watching eggs hatch, instead. She was dancing for us, and Dende said something about…" Bulma paused trying to remember his words. "Um, how only Goku's wife would dance like that. And I said that it just wasn't the same without you, and that's what happened."

"It wasn't the same?" Another few tears fell, she wiped them away. "But why trade me? Am I such a horrible husband?"

Bulma caught his face with both hands, forced him to look at her. "Goku, she does not think you are a horrible husband. She thought you were very inconsiderate, and she was right. You _were_ horribly inconsiderate. But she _does not_ want to trade you. She only said that because she was mad. She was just mad. She didn't mean it. Goku! Chi-Chi will not trade you for Vegeta. Understand?"

"Yeah." His voice was very small, but he was nodding. Bulma stood, ruffling his hair.

"Good. Now that that's settled, why don't you take her home?"

"You don't want me around, either?"

"Goku, the sun is coming up. I am going to send everyone home. They've been here all night! Your son needs to go to bed."

Bulma stretched, then shimmied the silken nightie over her hips. Vegeta was in bed, sound asleep. Unusual for him, normally he was getting up to train now. But then, he hadn't been in bed very long. She slid in next to him, glad it was a weekend. She didn't have to be anywhere today, so she could sleep and recover from the party.

A little grimace appeared as she thought over what had happened. She still couldn't believe Chi-Chi had made such a ridiculous suggestion. Trading Goku for Vegeta. As if they would ever do that! And yet, Vegeta hadn't gotten upset at all. _He smiled. That was it. A little smile. No freaking out, no objections. I would have expected that - but I was madder and more offended than he was. I don't understand. Why wasn't he upset? As jealous as he's always been of Goku, as often as he tears him down if I praise him, he didn't worry that I might agree? He goes on and on about Goku being nothing more than a low-class Saiyan, even though he knows Goku is stronger than he is, if I mention anything Goku and I did when we were kids. But he's not worried when Goku's _wife_ offers to trade me the Saiyan I decided not to take?_

Her thoughts turned to Namek. Namek… the planet that had brought Vegeta so permanently into her life. She remembered being afraid of him, terrified, actually. She remembered watching the clouds, wondering if she'd let the good one get away. Had she? Bulma reached out, almost touching her husband's face, then withdrew her hand. No, she had a good one. _Vegeta is good to me. We fight a lot, but I give as good as I get. I used to yell at Goku all the time too. But… did I admire him more? He was just a kid, but he was always doing such insane things - like beating an entire army by himself. Vegeta was Mr. Evil when I met him. It took him a long time to come around, to begin to show that he cared about anything other than power. He even would have let Trunks and I die when the androids came. It wasn't until much later…._ She sighed. _It doesn't really matter._

"B…Bulma?" Bulma turned, seeking the owner of the hoarse whisper. "Bulma?"

"Goku?" She sat up, confused. "What are you doing in my bedroom?"

"Bulma?" She heard his voice catch, the shaky release. "Bulma…" Suddenly, she had a lapful of Saiyan, a shivering, trembling Saiyan who was crying too hard to talk.

"Goku?! Goku, what's wrong?" She patted his head, stroking her fingers through the spikes. "Calm down. What's happened?" His answer was to wrap his arms around her waist, burying his face more firmly into her lap as he cried.

"What is going on?" Vegeta muttered, still more asleep than awake.

"I don't know. Maybe you can get through to him?"

"Him?" Vegeta sat up, took in the sight of his greatest rival and friend sobbing like a child in his wife's arms. "What the… Your wife throw you out again?"

"She…" That was the only word Bulma was able to understand, but Vegeta seemed able to tell what he was saying.

"SHE WHAT?" he yelped. "I will NOT."

"What?"

"She expects me to go stay with her in exchange for him staying with you," Vegeta snarled. "Is the bitch insane? I'd miss too much training!"

Bulma's comforting hand suddenly clenched Goku's hair, pulling hard enough to cause a pain-filled yelp to escape from among the heartbroken sobs. She patted his head gently to apologize for being mean. "I guess that means I have to calm him down. You're already late for your training."

Vegeta seemed to suddenly realize the sun was well up. A moment later, he was gone. Bulma's breath caught slightly, but she returned immediately to the task of soothing her oldest friend. "Goku, please. Tell me what happened."

She got the story in bits and pieces. He'd done as she said, and taken his family home. They'd put Goten to bed, and then gone to get ready for bed themselves. He'd done something to make her mad, and wasn't really sure what. All he'd done was get ready for bed, but Chi-Chi had rounded on him suddenly, yelling at him for "being me, I guess. I didn't do anything different. I didn't even rip my clothes, or drop them on the floor. I put them in the hamper, like she always tells me to. I don't know what I did. I don't, Bulma, really I don't."

He was sitting on the bed by the time she got that much out of him, his head resting against her chest, arms still wrapped around her. "She kept saying something about a garden. I thought maybe I was supposed to have weeded ours, but when I asked her if that was what it was, she hit me. I was at the top of the stairs, and fell all the way down. And she…" He hiccupped, scrubbed at his streaming eyes. "She told me to get out of her house. That I wasn't welcome… that I should go stay with you… and have you send Vegeta to her. She said he'd be a better mate than I was. She said Roshi would be a better mate than I am." He dissolved into incoherence again.

Bulma blinked. She knew Chi-Chi had a temper, and occasionally had whopped Goku with a frying pan for getting into food before he was supposed to, but knocking him down the stairs? And telling him that _Roshi_ would be a better mate than he was? Maybe Vegeta had a point about her being insane.

Goku's words became clear again, as he told her about sleeping outside, then weeding the garden, trying to undo whatever bad thing he'd done, or simple thing he'd forgotten. He'd taken care of the wood, gotten all of his chores done, even taken out the trash and cleaned the kitchen. He told her how he had groveled, literally on his knees, pleading for his wife's forgiveness. Chi-Chi's answer had been to smash her foot between his legs and her fist into his nose. She'd kicked him in the ribs a few time for good measure, and told him again to get out. Then she'd gone inside and slammed the door behind her.

"What did I do?" He drew away enough to look at her. "What did I do?"

"I don't know, Goku." Bulma snatched a tissue from the bedside table, mopping his face gently. "You can stay here until she gets over it. I've got plenty of room."

"No. No, I have to go home. I flew here, I'll fly back. She shouldn't still be mad when I get home. She doesn't stay mad at me for very long." He sounded like he was trying to make himself believe it, sitting back and gathering the remaining shreds of his composure. "I'll just… I'll just get myself cleaned up and go on home, Bulma. I'm sorry I cried all over you like that. She was just mad. I… she didn't mean it."

"All right, Goku." She ruffled his hair once more, then steered him to the bathroom before snuggling back into her pillows.

Goku flew home slowly, going over everything he'd done. He'd been late for the party, but Chi-Chi hadn't seemed all that mad at him, after the initial outburst. He'd behaved himself, and had even eaten less sloppily than normal. He'd laughed and talked with all his friends. He'd danced with her, with 18, with Bulma. So he'd behaved properly, hadn't he?

He'd taken her and the boys home, helped with getting Goten ready for bed. He'd checked in on Gohan, reminding him to make sure he got his homework done when he got up. That certainly couldn't have been what made her mad. Then, he'd gone to their room. Had he done something wrong there?

Goku turned over every action in his mind as he flew along. He couldn't think of a single thing he'd done that would have made her so angry. How could he apologize when he didn't know what it was he'd done wrong? Oh well, he'd try. There was the house, just ahead. He slowed, dropping down to land just outside the gate.

Vegeta punched air, dodged a bolt one of the training bots sent at him. His body was drenched in sweat, each movement causing him pain now. Still he fought the shadows, until at last he lay on the floor, gasping. He called out the command to stop the program, forcing himself to flop over onto his back.

He gazed up at the ceiling, a customary scowl darkening his face. Waking up to Kakarot in his bedroom, wrapped around his wife, had _not_ been the best way to wake up. Discovering the fool's wife had repeated her insane request to trade mates hadn't improved his temper any. Remembering the conversation he'd overheard between the clown and his wife had sent him to the gravity room to beat up his demons. _She kept saying how Chi-Chi would never actually trade Kakarot for me. But not once did she say she would not trade _me_ for Kakarot._

His gaze grew introspective as he turned that over in his mind, considering the implications. She had been trying to soothe Kakarot, of course. It was Kakarot's wife whom had proposed that ridiculous trade, after all. Bulma had seemed miffed. Yet, she hadn't tried to make Kakarot leave their room, had seemed more concerned over Kakarot than about him. Was it possible that she would consider such a trade? Gah, he was so tired he wasn't making sense.

Perhaps he should consider returning to bed. He was halfway there when he sensed Kakarot behind him. "What do you want?"

"My grandpa."

The answer was so strange that Vegeta whirled around to confront the larger man. "What makes you think…" he began as he turned, only to stop and stare in astonishment. "What happened to you?"

"It's not a good idea to try to apologize for something when you don't know what you did wrong, and the woman you're apologizing to has a big knife in her hand." Goku swayed unsteadily, one hand gripped tightly around the wound in the arm he held against his gashed chest. His normally orange gi was dark with blood, and slashed up. "Could I stay here for a few days?"

Vegeta snorted. "As if Bulma would let me say no. Go ahead, choose a room. I certainly don't care."

Goku took two steps, and fell flat on his face. The back of the shirt was ribbons, his back running freely with blood from the numerous wounds. Vegeta shut his gaping mouth and moved with amazing speed, given his own condition. He sent a servant after Bulma, and put Goku in the first guest room he came to. He'd gotten the other man stripped by the time his wife arrived.

"His wife wasn't happy to have him come home." He walked from the room, knowing perfectly well his wife would be well able to tend her friend. She'd had to tend him often enough, he was sure Kakarot wouldn't be nearly as much trouble. His own wounds he would tend himself.

"Goku? Oh, Goku!" Bulma set to work immediately. She never seemed to have any senzu beans when she really needed them. "Oh, what happened?"

"Chi-Chi was still mad."

"CHI-CHI DID THIS?!!!!" Bulma yelped, pausing momentarily in her work to repair him.

"I shouldn't've said anything," Goku murmured tiredly. "I shouldn't've gone home so soon, I guess."

"You just plan on staying here until you're all healed up, Goku," Bulma said firmly. "You're in no condition to go anywhere anyway."

"Is it okay if I take a nap now?"

In spite of her anger, Bulma had to laugh. "Yes, Goku. Go to sleep."

"You stabbed him, Chi-Chi! What in the world did he do?"

"As if you don't know!" the other woman snarled.

"How could I?" Bulma asked, completely confused. "He couldn't stay awake long enough to tell me anything other than that you were still mad! Honestly, I don't think he knows what he did."

There was a moment of silence from the phone. "In the garden, at your party. Ring any bells?"

"At my party?" Bulma frowned. "The garden?" A perfectly manicured fingernail rubbed thoughtfully at her nose. "Oh! Do you mean when I was trying to calm him down?"

"CALM HIM DOWN????!!!"

"He'd heard about your offer to trade him for Vegeta. He got really upset…. I took him outside to calm him down. I told him you weren't serious. But he seemed to think that he had to be a terrible husband, since you'd suggested it, and it took me forever to convince him that you were just mad because he'd put something else ahead of you again. Although I don't think I got that through his thick skull. He kept saying you had to be serious because he knew he wasn't dependable."

The silence this time was very long. "I was serious. I still am. Don't bother to send him back." The line went dead.

Bulma hung the phone up. She walked to the kitchen, and began making enough sandwiches to feed three starving Saiyans. After a moment of reflection, she made enough for four. Goten was probably with Trunks. She piled a great many of them on a tray, and made her way to Goku's room. "Hey. You hungry?"

Goku eyed the tray of sandwiches. "Always!"

"I thought so." She set the tray down, helped him get comfortable, then settled it across his lap. "Enjoy. I never did learn more than the basics in the kitchen."

"You didn't need to," Goku said through the mouthful of sandwich he'd bitten off.

"True, but I married a Saiyan. I should at least learn to burn a steak properly." She stared out the window, not noticing that Goku had put down a half-eaten sandwich.

"Is something wrong? I mean, with you and Vegeta? Should…" Goku winced suddenly, realizing that offering to talk to Vegeta was one of the stupidest things he could suggest. He couldn't keep his wife happy, how could he advise Vegeta on such a thing?

"No, not really. I'm used to it."

"What? Used to what?" Goku sat up, reaching out for her without thinking. "OWWW!" He slumped back against his pillows.

"Goku?" Bulma turned from the window. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine." He grinned, as if to prove it. "What did you mean, used to it?"

"Him being himself." Good an explanation as any, Bulma thought. "Me being me."

"Ummm… okay." He picked up his discarded sandwich, disposing of it in two bites. The remaining sandwiches followed swiftly. "I just thought something was wrong."

Bulma looked at him, sheet up to his waist and bandages covering most of his exposed body. "There's nothing wrong with me, Goku." She couldn't bring herself to admit that something was wrong. How was she supposed to tell her best friend that his wife really didn't want him back?

"Is it me?" He touched the bandages. "I'm healing okay, aren't I?"

"You're healing fine."

"Oh, good. I really want to go home." He blinked at the look he caught as she whirled to stare out the window again. "B… Bulma? I can go home when I'm better, can't I?"

She turned from the window, picked up the empty tray. "I have to go feed the boys. Trunks brought Goten home again."

"Bulma?" But he spoke to the closed door. "I… can't go home?" He fell back against the pillows. "I can't go home?"

"What do you want, Kakarot?"

"To train. I need to train. I've been in bed too long."

"Yes, you have." Vegeta proceeded with his own training, only occasionally glancing at the other Saiyan. Something finally penetrated. "Kakarot, I thought you said you needed to train."

"I do." Goku continued with his exercises.

"Then why are you goofing off. Train!" Vegeta lobbed an energy blast at the other. Goku barely managed to deflect it. "You're barely concentrating!" A series of blasts followed, and Goku hit the floor of the GR with a resounding thud. "What is the matter with you? Your wounds healed days ago."

"I can't go home."

"Why not?" Vegeta threw several lightening fast punches, shadow boxing with himself again.

"Chi-Chi doesn't want me there." Goku rose slowly from the floor, one hand pressed to his chest.

"Whose house is it, yours or hers?" Vegeta sniped.

"It's hers. Her father gave it to her when she decided to marry me."

Vegeta turned, shocked. "It's hers? You allow a woman to provide for you?"

Goku blinked twice. "Um, isn't that what Bulma does for you?"

"I am a prince, Kakarot. The people I protect are supposed to take care of my needs. You are a low level soldier! You should be providing for your family, not the other way around."

"Oh." A defeated little whisper of sound, lost in the swishing of Vegeta's movements. "I have to go, Vegeta. I have… stuff to do."

"Whatever."

A failure. He was… a failure. He'd never realized it before, but there could be no doubt that he was. He had never taken any thought to anything but fighting, not really. Fighting and having adventures. His marriage had been an adventure, but had soon palled. Chi-Chi nagged. About everything. But… she'd had the right. He had been failing her all this time, and now he knew it.

"Goku?" A hand touched his shoulder. "Penny for your thoughts?"

"They aren't worth that much."

"I thought you were going to train with Vegeta today?"

"I did."

"It doesn't look like it. You're both usually battered beyond belief when you finish training with each other." Bulma settled beside him on the ground, looping her arm companionably over his shoulder. "Want to talk about it?"

"No." He couldn't help leaning into her, though. He needed that comfort. "Bulma? Can I have a hug?"

Bulma wrapped him in her arms, holding him tightly. "I'm so sorry, Goku. I never thought she meant it."

"I was never very dependable, was I, Bulma?"

"You were."

"I was?"

"I always depended on you to protect me, to beat the bad guy. And you always did. You could always be depended on to give anyone a second chance. You can definitely be depended on to empty out the refrigerator and the pantry. And I expect you will train and keep yourself in shape until the day you die, just in case you need to save the world again."

"But I'm not a dependable husband."

"Oh, Goku…" Bulma shook her head. "Saiyans don't seem to be."

"You mean," he looked up in shock, "Vegeta isn't dependable?"

"Oh, he's dependable, all right. I can depend on him to train the greater majority of any given day, conveniently forget to do his chores, be irritable at most times, constantly hungry, always demanding, and to make me feel like the most special woman in the entire world when he wants to. Saiyans do not make good husbands. You guys are far too self-centered as far as training and fighting are concerned, and not interested enough in taking care of your families. I think training your sons is the only thing either of you have been consistent about where family is concerned. Neither one of you have jobs, you both live off what Chi-Chi and I make, or the occasional tournament wins. Well, you do the tournament wins, anyway. Vegeta doesn't even do that."

"But… he's a prince. He protects you, so you provide what he needs?" Goku couldn't quite make it a statement.

"Vegeta is your prince, not mine, and you've protected me a lot longer than he has. Did I ever have to provide for you?"

Goku thought about it. "You always had the capsule stuff. Doesn't that count?"

"Would you have expected me to give you what I had just because you were there?"

"Well, no. I guess not. I wasn't really used to people, you know."

"And now that you are?"

He blinked. "But… I'm not. Not really. I know you, and Yamcha, and Chi-Chi, and Krillen and 18. I know the Ox King, and Vegeta and Piccolo, and the boys. I know Turtle and Master Roshi and Baba and King Yemma. I know King Kai and Old Kai and a lot of dead guys. I know your parents, and Hercule and Videl and Buu. I know Dende and Puar and Oolong and Mr. Popo, Yajerobe and Master Korin. I'm not used to people."

"But what about all the people you met on our adventures and your training journeys? What about them?"

"I met them. I don't really know them. I don't see them anymore, and only met most of them once. You know that. The rest of you guys I know." He grimaced. "I know Shenlong better than I know most people."

Bulma blinked. "Would you expect them to give you stuff just because you were with them?" she repeated, determined to get him to answer the question.

"But Bulma, most of them did. They gave me food, or shelter, or training. They gave me clothes and sometimes a little money. I've never really not had anyone helping me, except the time between when Grandpa died and I met you. I got everything for myself then." He rubbed at his nose. "I'm not dependable."

She shook him. "Stop saying that!"

"But I'm not, Bulma."

"You are too. So stop saying you aren't!"

"But, Bulma…" His eyes widened in shock as she shut him up in the only other way she could think of. She kissed him aggressively, nipping at his lips if he tried to talk. Finally, he shut up and started kissing her back.

Blood. He was covered in it. Bruised, battered, cut and bleeding. Vegeta staggered from the GR, made his way to the shower. He tipped his head back, allowing the warm water to rinse the blood from his face, hair, and the still sluggishly bleeding cut above his eye. Again, he'd worn himself to nothing, again destroying several of the training bots. However, he hadn't managed to dodge all the shrapnel, and would have a few new scars to show for it.

What was Kakarot's problem? Had he never provided for his little family? Vegeta frowned, leaning against the shower wall. If he were to admit the truth, Kakarot had done more to provide for his family than Vegeta had for his. All he had was his birthright. His home destroyed, he no longer had the riches or prestige that came with it. Still, he was a prince, and he acted it. He kept his mind and body sharp, in the event he needed to protect his small family, or his adopted world. He strove to be the best, though he knew he would always take second place to Kakarot.

Kakarot. It was well and past time the man went home. He had his own family, no matter how badly he provided for them. Vegeta was beginning to become annoyed by the amount of time his wife was spending with his friendly rival. It didn't help that he still couldn't shake the impression that Bulma would trade him for the other Saiyan.

An impression that solidified as he walked out into the garden in search of his wife, only to find her wrapped in Kakarot's arms and obviously the aggressor. He watched numbly as his wife, completely oblivious to his presence, seduced the man. She silenced his objections, and soon the two were intimately entwined.

Vegeta turned, made his way blindly to his room. This he had never expected. Not even knowing that Bulma would always take Kakarot's side, that Kakarot thought Bulma prettier than his own wife. His heart, once cold and uncaring, had thawed. Now, it cracked. His age and his anger worked against him. He slumped to the floor.

_I shouldn't have done that. She'll be angry. She'll be so mad… What can I do? What should I do? It shouldn't have happened. I _knew_ better. I did! Why didn't I stop? Vegeta will kill me if Chi-Chi doesn't. How can I ever go home now?_ The tears tracing down his cheeks were his constant companions these days. He didn't leave his room anymore, pretended to be asleep if anyone came in to check on him. _I am truly a failure now. I thought I was after what Vegeta said, but now I know it. I can't even keep my promises anymore. I broke my _wedding_ vows! How can I be anything but a failure?_

He probed the area carefully, feeling none of the energies that indicated the members of the house. He slid from the bed, closing himself up in the bathroom only to slump against the shower wall. _If I had provided for them, would Chi-Chi have been so angry with me? If I had paid more attention to her instead of to my training, and saving the world? I thought…. No. I didn't think. That was… is… the problem. Chi-Chi yells at me so often for not thinking. I didn't think when Bulma kissed me. I just reacted. Like I always do._

He soaped himself absent-mindedly, though being careful of half-healed skin. _I could go back. The worst she can do is kill me. I've been dead before, I suppose I have to die again sometime. At least if she kills me, I'll die at the hand of someone I love._

The thought arrested his hand, and he stared down at the soap for a long moment before continuing his shower. He wanted to die. For the first time in his life, he wanted to die. He wasn't willing to die if that was what was necessary. This was different. He rinsed off, slipped into his clothes. He took a deep breath, and settled two fingers to his forehead.

Goku reappeared at his front door. He stared at it a long moment, then set trembling fingers against it. She had rejected him twice now, three times counting her original offer to trade. Suddenly, the door swung open.

Pain-glazed, drugged eyes opened slowly, took in the surroundings. "Why didn't you let me die?"

"I love you."


	2. Aftermath: Vegeta & Bulma

Good grief, everyone wanted continuation. That lovely vague ending, I guess. Do you have any idea how hard it is to type while eating a caramel apple???? **Note to self - redo. After reviewing reviews, it just don't work.**

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Tatoosh: Yes! A loyal reader! J How many of my ficcies is it you've reviewed now? I'm so mean to the boys, I know. Now I have to come up with something fluffy. I wonder if I can do light and fluffy? (Oh, this is old. I did Costume Party…) I had to rewrite this.

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Mirokufan: It figures. At least now that look of extreme annoyance Bulma had makes considerably more sense. But really, how good a story could I have come up with from "I'm prettier than you, so you can't have him?" Temper tantrum, maybe. There are massive differences (I'm learning) between the Japanese and English versions. I'm really starting to wonder about the translators though. There's a hell of a difference between I'm prettier and Let's trade.

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Nasiya: No solution will satisfy everyone, especially she who asked for a hentai resolution. Why do they both think they've got the wrong Saiyan? They don't. I was referring to when in the Namek saga, Bulma was wondering if letting Goku go in favor of Yamcha had been such a good idea, and in my fic, Chi-Chi was irritated at Bulma basically being all over Goku in the garden (er, before the seduction, which she thankfully did not witness).

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Kitsune-sama: Okay, hopefully this chapter will help with that.

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Ice-Maiden: I pick on Vegeta horribly, it is a proven fact. If you like the psychological stuff, go read Unforgivable. (Another one of my oneshots that no longer is…. More angst…) And same to you that I tell Chris down below. No fighting!

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Lady Tskuya: Need a Vegeta pov? Well, you'll have to settle for the below.

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Kenshin the legendary swo: Heartwarming????? You're the only one with that opinion. Feel free to elaborate, I want to know why.

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Almight Aiken-chan: Hey, wait, I sent you an email! Oh, you don't need to be sad or to cry! I'm updating!

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Rai-en-chan: That was a kind of forgotten thing, wasn't it? Although, apparently only in the English version. (points at Mirokufan - see, he said so! Er…she?) I forget, I think I was watching an old tape and saw that again… just went with it.

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Bee3: continuing!

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PanBraSaiyan: Thank you. I'll take a look at yours after a bit.

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Helga96: Why in the world do you think that Goku telling Vegeta that Bulma was prettier than Chi-Chi would make Vegeta _less_ mad? And I haven't got a wife. Haven't even got a boyfriend, so can't answer that last one. It hasn't come up.

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Chris-warren876: huh? Oh. Hey, review the story, not the reviews! Meanie! Now I have no idea if you liked it or hated it or thought I had all my commas out of place. *goes off to mope*

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Minna-sama no megami: Yeah, the boys need a big hug! But sorry, this is not one of my yaoi stories, nor will it be.

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Delicate Vampire Beauty: *finishes boggling at the review* THANK YOU! Now, how the devil am I gonna live up to that?

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Note to everyone!!! To clear something up, so that you guys aren't screaming at each other, I do not consider a review a flame unless it is excessively rude and has no merit on or bearing to the story. I have no problem with people pointing out that something is badly written, or expressing how what I wrote affected them. That's generally been constructive criticism (which I need) and honest feedback (which I generally love).

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Pain-glazed, drugged eyes opened slowly, took in the surroundings. "Why didn't you let me die?"

"I love you."

"Do you?"

"Of course! How could you think I don't?"

He turned his head, looking out the bedroom window. "It's rather easy to think that."

Rage blossomed in her eyes. "What?"

"You wanted that trade."

"Trade?" Confusion warred with rage, comprehension set in, and rage won. "I do _not_ want to trade you! Why the hell would you think that?"

"I saw you."

"Saw me?" Now the confusion was back. She sat on the bed next to him, put her hand lightly over his. "Vegeta, I would never trade you for Goku. I love you too much."

"Then what were you doing with him in the garden?" He turned to face her, eyes hard. "Are you telling me you fucked him because you love me?"

She recoiled, hands pressed to her mouth as her eyes filled with tears. She reached out again, tentatively. "I'm so sorry, Vegeta. I never meant for that to happen."

He struggled against the drug haze, forced himself to sit up. "_You_ were the one who started it. _You_, not him. _You _were the one who took him, not the other way. How can you sit there and tell me you _didn't mean _for it to happen?" He shook his head, snapping angrily, "You _still _smell of him!"

Bulma took a deep breath, meeting his eyes squarely. "Actually, I didn't mean for it to happen. I just wanted to shut him up. No! Let me finish!" She held up a warding hand when he started to speak. "Honestly, Vegeta, you jump to conclusions as badly as Chi-Chi does. She thought my conversation with Goku after the party was some sort of… tryst. All I wanted to do was make him smile again! I hate it when he cries.

"And he thinks he's a failure, that he has to be a failure, because he doesn't provide very well for his family, and because he isn't dependable. He was so unhappy, and he wouldn't quit talking about it. I kissed him to shut him up."

"You did more than kiss."

"Don't interrupt me." He waited, she was quiet, one finger tapping pensively at the side of her mouth. Finally, she began, "I did do more than kiss him, I know that. I guess we both wanted to be comforted, and that was just the easiest way. And before you ask, you aren't the easiest man to live with. It's been over six months since the last time you had any time for me, since we did anything more than sleep in this bed. I lost control."

"When did you plan to tell me?"

"I didn't," she admitted candidly. "You're cranky enough, without knowing that I slept with Goku."

"That was not sleeping."

"Fucked him, then. Still."

"And you expect me to what? Forgive and forget?" he asked harshly.

She laughed, suddenly relaxing. "No, I don't. I expect you to go to the Gravity Room and do your best to blow it to pieces, be silent and surly for the next several weeks - no, months - beat the crap out of Goku every chance you get, and maybe get around to telling me that my lapse in judgment will be held against me forever, but you have a use for my body."

He couldn't help the tiny smile. They had been together long enough he could recognize the truth in her words, but he still pulled away when she reached out to him again. "I may have a use for you later, but I certainly don't now. Go away. You reek of him."

Hurt flashed in her eyes. "Fine, your Highness. I'll just leave you to your sulking." She started for the door.

"You say that like I don't have a reason to be angry."

She whirled. "You don't! You ignore me and insult me constantly. You don't care about anyone but yourself - not even your son! If you want to blame someone for me wanting to be held, to be made love to, blame yourself!" The door slammed behind her.

Bulma ran for the bathroom, started a shower. She got under the warm spray, only to sink down to the floor. "You big idiot. I love you. I just hate how you treat me - like I don't matter unless you want me."

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I think Goku's homecoming should be a different chapter. And then, I have to decide how far to carry this out. To a reconciliation? We all know it happens, or our two unhappy couples wouldn't make it to the next Tournament. Opinions, please.


	3. Aftermath: Goku & ChiChi

"What do you want?"

"You were right. I should have been a better husband. I should have been more dependable." Goku shook his head. "I was wrong. I was… stupid. I don't think, I never think, and it gets me into trouble. I'm never around when you need me. I spend too much time fighting and training, and not enough time with you. I tell you I'll do things, and then I don't or I forget or I'm late. I'm sorry. I just… I wanted you to know that."

"Oh, Goku!" Her lower lip trembled, and she started to throw herself on him.

"NO! No, not yet." He took a hurried step back. "I broke our wedding vows. I didn't mean to, I didn't. I don't know why I did."

"It's all right, Goku." She slid her arms around him. "I forgive you."

"You do?" For a moment, he was stunned, then a bright, vivacious smile lit his face. "You do?!" He swooped her up, swinging her round and round in circles. "I promise I'll do better Chi-Chi! You'll see! I'll be the best husband ever!" It never occurred to him that she had misunderstood what he meant by breaking his vow.

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*Blushes with embarrassment.* Depressingly short. *has to wonder what will happen when Chi-chi does get a clue…*


	4. The Price of Trading

Oh me oh my oh you! Hmm… I've had more reviews on this story than I'd expected, and now I'm quite certain that the Goku/Chi-Chi short is going to get me blasted to bits. *starts practicing defensive moves* Oh well… I'd expected that anyway.

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Tatoosh: Yeah, it would take awhile. There's what, a five year gap in the show between that party and the next time Bulma sees Goku? Not that I have to have it take five years, of course. After all, if Bulma ain't already pregnant, she's got to be fairly soon, because isn't Bra just about a year older than Pan?

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Aikenlicious: Ended there cause my thoughts went phzzt! Bloodshed… yeah, Vegeta not a happy man. Yeah, Bulma was a bad girl. She deserves whopped. Goku's gonna get it, though. He has to… Chi-Chi finds out exactly what he meant by breaking his vows.

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Ice Maiden: hallo! No, I didn't figure it for a flame. Please note: he has not forgiven her. At the time we left him, he had basically just suffered a heart attack (literally & figuratively) and wasn't feeling so hot.

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Kenshin…: your name's too long! J So, you want to see a switch. Hmm…. *attaches jumper cables to brain* um… well… not this time. Technical difficulties. *tries shocky things doctors use* Ow.

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They met, a resounding thunderclap echoing through the valley from their power. Goku tumbled over backwards, barely breaking his fall before Vegeta nailed him in the gut. The smaller Saiyan was on fire, and determined to turn his rival into mincemeat. He zoomed beneath the falling form, arrowing upwards. His clenched fists caught Goku in the small of his back, forcing him up again. Goku's howl of pain, easily heard for miles, was cut short by another kick to his gut. This time, Vegeta let him fall, then arrowed down to smash full force with both feet into Goku's stomach.

He retched blood, much to Vegeta's satisfaction. "Ow. Man, Vegeta, that hurt!"

"Good." He waited grimly for Kakarot to get back up, but the other man flopped back down into the crater he'd made when he landed.

"Bulma told you, didn't she?" Goku said. 

"She didn't tell me. I saw you."

"I didn't mean for it to happen, Vegeta, but I didn't want to hurt her." Goku sighed, sitting back up carefully. He was bruised, bleeding from more places than he could count, and fairly certain he had a couple broken bones.

"And that makes everything fine?" Vegeta barked angrily. "You fuck my wife, and expect me not to mind?" He stepped forward, backhanded Goku back into the dirt.

Goku wiped the fresh blood from his mouth, fingering a split lip. "Well, no. I guess not," he said slowly. "I didn't really think about it." He ate dirt again when Vegeta, airborne again, kicked him in the face.

"You never think, baka! What will your wife say when she finds out?"

"She said she forgives me," Goku answered with a puzzled little frown. "I told her, and she just jumped on me and hugged me and told me it was alright, and that she forgave me."

Vegeta dropped to the ground, mouth open in shock. "She forgave you? Just like that?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, I thought she'd throw a big fit, smack me with a frying pan or something, but she didn't." Goku sat up again, carefully watching Vegeta in case he was going to get hit again.

"That does not sound like the harpy to me."

"She's not a harpy, Vegeta. Harpies are half bird and half woman. Chi-Chi's a princess."

"She is not. She's a witch."

"She's a princess, honest! Her father's a king. You know that."

Vegeta blinked, then merely backhanded Goku again. "She's a harpy witch. It's her fault for suggesting Bulma trade me for you."

Goku wiped the bloody mud from his eyes as he tried to process what Vegeta had said. "You mean…" he asked quietly, "Bulma… was… trading… you? I don't understand. She loves you. I mean," he scrabbled backward when Vegeta started to hit him again, but kept talking, "she told me she loved you, in spite of Saiyans making lousy husbands. Why would she want me? Why would she do that, why did she?" His eyes filled with tears, and he didn't even try to dodge the boot that caught him squarely in the face. The sharp little crack of breaking bone was lost in the sound of his thoughts. "I don't understand. Maybe…" he jerked under another impact, this one to his ribs, "Chi-Chi can tell me," he finished in a whisper, and raised his arms to block another blow. He was too late.

It finally occurred to Vegeta that he didn't actually want to kill the man, so he picked up the unconscious, bloody mess and dropped it in Goku's front yard. To the harpy that came rushing out the door, he merely said, "The price of trading," before vanishing toward CC.

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Okay, was that a little better? Soothe most everyone's lust for blood at least temporarily? I hope so. I stink at writing fights!


	5. Wouldn't that be fair?

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Tatoosh: Yes, I'm going to continue it out a bit longer. He is a loyal one, isn't he? But, I'm not too sure about their relationship being best served by divorce. They have more trouble in the land of fanfiction than they do in the show, it seems to me. He's dead too often for them to have problems…

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Lady Tskuya: Oh, cherries on top and everything? *sets up her little Seto w/dragons up next to her transforming Goku* Hm. I dunno.

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Raquel Kamikaze: Congratulations! I believe you're the first Chi-Chi fan I've ever encountered! I'm not entirely sure if I've been flamed or merely criticized on having ooc characters? And how does having Bulma basically rape Goku have her seem kind? I never said she fell for Goku. *double checks* Nope. Now, keep in mind that this is fan fiction, not the show. OOCness is frequently employed for the purpose of the story's direction. It's called… dammit. I forgot the phrase. Poetic license? That's it!

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Mkh2 (aka Mikki): Feral children? Yes, I've heard of them. Goku doesn't really qualify, does he? How long was it between the time he killed Gohan and when Bulma found him? I've always gotten the impression it couldn't have been more than a few years. I'm officially confused. What did Vegeta say? The provisioning thing? Alright, alright! I know she's out of character, already! Gimme a break here, I'm just now getting to see the start of the romance. (I still think she yells at him too much.)

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Dark Angel: Not like the others? Oh, how horribly vague of you! Yes, I find constructive criticism to be fairly useful. Tatoosh up there is really good about yelling at me when I screw something up. Eventually, I might be up to 'professional writer' status.

Now everyone, keep in mind that I do find _constructive _criticism useful. Being yelled at *eyes certain people* because I'm using a tactic they don't favor isn't very helpful. Vegeta's the only one I ever seem to be able to keep in character… *remembers something* … well, mostly. *wanders off, whistling innocently*

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_I hurt too much to be dead. So, I must be alive. I think I'd rather be dead. _The reason he'd been beaten finally presented itself. _Vegeta let me live? He was so angry… and I have to ask Chi-Chi why Bulma would trade Vegeta. She told me she loved him. Ow. My head hurts too much to think._

It was a struggle to do so simple a thing as opening his eyes. And then he wished he hadn't, as bright sunlight was pouring in through the window he faced. Snapping them closed again was easy enough. "Ouch."

"Goku! Oh, sweetheart, you're awake! That Vegeta…" Chi-Chi was off on a rant about Vegeta beating her precious husband. Goku didn't feel well enough to even blink at the oddness, opting instead to just lay there and let her take care of him while he tried to get his battered brain back in working order. She wound down about the same time he realized he really needed to get to the bathroom, and tried levering himself up.

"So, did you enjoy beating him?" He ignored her, she'd expected it. "Chi-Chi called. Apparently you finally won a spar. What'd he do, just stand there and let you smash him because he was feeling guilty?"

Vegeta favored his wife with a disgusted look before continuing to rummage through the refrigerator. He found what he wanted, and walked back out of the house, never saying a word to Bulma.

"And he's surprised I would turn to someone else for comfort," she sighed, going back to her interrupted chores. "I bet Goku did just that, too. He probably does feel guilty. Poor kid."

This time, when he woke up, there wasn't any pain at all. He sat up, patting at places he knew his bones had broken, to find them healed. "What?" he whispered.

"I brought you a senzu."

"Vegeta!" Goku spun to face the open window. "You… brought me… Why?"

Vegeta humphed. "Does it matter?"

Goku blinked a couple times. "Well, I guess not. Um… are you here for Chi-Chi?"

"What makes you think I would be here for _her_?" Vegeta asked.

"Well," classic Son pose, "um… I just… thought you would… um…"

"Spit it out, Kakarot."

"Well, since I had sex with Bulma, shouldn't you with Chi-Chi?" He hadn't realized it was possible for the normally surly Saiyan to look that angry.

"Absolutely not!"

"Why? Wouldn't that be fair? You said it was her fault, and Bulma traded you for me, so you should have sex with Chi-Chi." Goku's eyes crossed and he crumpled to the ground. Chi-Chi glared at Vegeta over her husband's limp body, frying pan in hand.

"What is he blabbering about?"

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I officially declare myself Queen of Short Chapters. J *reads* And Nonsense! But what fun to have Vegeta explain it to Chi-Chi. Or will he? Maybe he should refer her to Bulma?


	6. You've got me now

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Tatoosh: Hmm… *hates me…* Yes, Chi-Chi had a very good idea, but that doesn't mean she wanted to believe it. It is the ever-faithful Goku we're talking about here. He doesn't do things like that… until we writers make him. Thank you for the compliment on my hells. I strive to improve them. *blinks* Realistic and sweet? *blinks a few more times* As in fluff? I've been practicing…

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Kenshin…: I wrote it just for you, oh requester of blood & the best I could manage for mayhem.

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Chris-Warren876: Is okay. One thing to think about: it is not always the strongest who wins.

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Passing girl: *blink* What? Manly conversations? *gets a clue* Ohhhhh… um, okay.

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"Oh, I think you understood him perfectly. But, since you ask," Vegeta smirked, "My wife took you up on your offer to trade. He seems to think I should fuck you because she fucked him."

The frying pan fell from her fingers to land with a dull thud on Goku's face. "Goku wouldn't do that."

"Oh? He spent weeks at our house recovering, believing you couldn't stand him and didn't want him back," Vegeta needled her. "Why wouldn't he fuck a willing woman?"

"But…" Chi-Chi looked helplessly down at Goku. "He… he wouldn't. No. That's not like him at all. He might not be very dependable, but he's loyal! He would not have done that!"

Vegeta laughed at her. "I watched them. I watched, while my wife tried to calm your crybaby of a husband down, tried to put all his shattered pieces back together. And then… I watched her fuck him. It was quite a show. And my wife was still reeking of him when she came to find me afterwards. Maybe I should take you… like she took him. Maybe I should let you know what it's like, to be traded off on a whim," he snarled.

She recoiled as the prince slowly advanced toward her, malice written clearly on his face. "It's not like that! He always makes promises he doesn't keep, says he'll do things and forgets. I wanted him…" She took a step toward the door, then another. "I wanted him to hurt enough that he'd actually think!"

"So to make him hurt enough, you tried to kill him? Is that it?" He reached out, grabbed her arm. "You sent him to my wife, so that his emotions would get in an uproar?" She strained against him when he pulled her closer. "You offered to trade him for me so that he would think about how he treated you? Well, you've got me now. How do you like it?"

"Let me go!"

"You didn't think things through very well. I'm not… sweet." He pinned her against the wall. "Let me remind you…"

_What happened? I was talking to Vegeta… and now… where am I?_ Goku opened his eyes, blinked at the ceiling. _My room, on the floor. How did I get on the floor? My head hurts. Did Vegeta hit me again? He looked mad enough to kill me. What's that noise? Oh, it's Chi-Chi. She sure sounds pissed off about something. I bet she found out Vegeta was here… Why is there a frying pan on my nose?_

Goku sat up, grabbing the frying pan as it dropped from his face. "Oh! I get it! Chi-Chi knocked me out. Well, that's normal. Now where can I put this so she can't find it again?" He regarded the pan dubiously. "Then again, she has other ones. I guess I better take it to the kitchen. Ummm, I suppose I better wait until she calms down some. I don't want hit again."

"Where did she learn to hit like that?" Vegeta threw an arm over the bed, levering himself up.

"Her dad. And she spars with me sometimes, or the boys. I thought you left?"

"No. She belted me over the head with something she yanked off the wall. And then punched me." Vegeta crawled to his feet, crunching shards of the weapon underfoot. "I still say she's a harpy witch," he added, rubbing the knot on his head.

"No, she isn't. She's just… moody."

"Moody? Moody? The woman's a tempest of overflowing anger and irritability! She's more dangerous than… than Cell and Frieza and Buu combined!" Vegeta complained. "Are you going to get off the floor?"

"What? Oh. Yeah." Goku scrambled to his feet. "What'd she hit you for?"

Vegeta growled. "You can keep your wife. I'm going back to mine."

Goku beamed at him. "Hey, that's great! I was afraid you were going to be mad at her."

"I am. Sunup tomorrow, the usual place."

"Okay!" His smile faded slightly. "Are you still mad at me?"

"No. You, I pity." With that, Vegeta took off through the window.

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Yes, Chi-Chi is stronger than your average woman. Has to be, she raised two Saiyan brats in the middle of nowhere.


	7. Not what I thought

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Tatoosh: J I went for the frying pan instead… I like the fpod theme. Of course, now I have to get them all sorted out. *groan* and there's still that Bulma pregnant thing to deal with. *whimper* Naw, not that you hated me… this ficcy - wrong pairings!

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Iris: *blink* I labeled Bulma as a victim? As for longer chapters, well, those happen in spurts. I tend to have a specific page length I allow for chapter length, however, this story seems to prefer to be written in short bursts. *muttering about extremely short bursts* 

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Keebler-elmo: *reads name* Um… you scare me. Officially. *hides*

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Rai-en-chan: yes? What about Bra's age and the pregnancy? I have difficulty keeping anyone in character, some days. I think today is going to be one of those days. I had a request for a preggie Goku in another story, so I'm in ooc mode. (oh, and he opened his mouth…)

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Aikenlicious: hehe… it wasn't supposed to go into as much detail as it did. I've made the suggested rating change, and thank you for pointing that out. Hmm… what an interesting idea. I'll consider that. Having watched a few episodes of GT, I'm of the opinion now that the only good thing about it is going to be ssj4, and it is therefore ignorable. As for Uub… *shrugs* wasn't impressed. Something juicy? *blink* Oh, she shouldn't've been able to down the prince, eh?

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Kenshin…: Yeah, this one isn't coming along quite as quickly as my yaoi fics. For some reason, it requires considerably more thought. Probably because I'm trying to make it somewhat humorous. Is it working?

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Passing girl: Naw, manly is a real word. Meant what you said though.

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Kitkat: *facefaults* A CHICHI fan?!!!! Wow. I'm astonished. I don't think anyone else could actually put up with him for all that long, though. *contemplates Aiken's idea* Don't know how this will turn out, though.

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"I wonder why he pities me?" Goku shrugged, and looked at the frying pan. "I guess…." He listened. Chi-Chi was being quiet. He walked out of the bedroom, peeking around the hall door to find out where his wife was. She wasn't in the living room. He peeked around the kitchen door. "Um, Chi-Chi? Do you want th…." Thwack. Thud.

Chi-Chi glared down at her husband, tears of pain and rage _How dare he?_ running down her face. She scooped up the frying pan Goku had returned, and plunked the one she'd conked him with back on the stove.

"One of these days, you're going to hit me hard enough for me to remember what Vegeta said I forgot," Goku moaned, using the doorframe to help haul himself up. She ignored him, continuing with the cooking she'd been doing. There was enough to feed a small army of Saiyans, and Goku flushed. She only cooked that much when she was really, really mad - or they were having a party. And he didn't think they were having a party. "I'm really sorry, Chi. I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry I upset you." He grinned, hoping to be forgiven for whatever it was he'd done.

THWACK. He reeled backwards, managing to stay on his feet this time. "I'll… just… um… go catch some fish." He scuttled out the door before he could get whacked again. He cried all the way to the stream, trying to figure out just what it was he'd done. The only bad thing he knew he'd done was with Bulma, and she'd told him that didn't matter.

He shed his clothes at the edge of the stream and dove in. In short order, he'd caught three fish. Two would go in the freezer. The third he ate. It gave him time to think.

_Okay, what've I done recently? Well… there was the spar with Vegeta. But she was mad at him. I remember her ranting on about him beating me so badly. Then again, she hit me the first time right after I asked Vegeta if… oh. I bet she heard me and didn't like that idea. Maybe that's why she belted Vegeta too. My head sure hurts. I wish she'd pick a different way to let me know she's mad at me._

But that's probably why she was mad. Yeah, that's when she hit me, so that's got to be it.I'll have to apologize for saying that it would have been okay for Vegeta to have sex with her. From the way my head feels, she obviously didn't agree. I'll just tell her I'm sorry for saying it would have been fair for Vegeta to have sex with her, she'll forgive me, and everything will be back to normal.

His plan in place, Goku picked up his two remaining fish and headed for home.

Bulma wasn't in the least surprised when her prediction about Vegeta came true. He'd wasted no time once he'd gotten home from Goku's the second time, grabbing her arm and forcing her to their bedroom. He hadn't been gentle, or considerate, or even remotely interested in pleasuring her in any way - she hadn't really expected that - but he also had ignored every protest she'd raised. Unfortunately, she had the feeling that was how sex was going to be for awhile.

She tried moving again, then flopped back against the pillows. Moving would be out for awhile. That was fine, it gave her more time to consider Vegeta's last words before he'd walked out. Why in the world would he say he pitied Kakarot for not having kept her?

_Vegeta doesn't ever say things like that. And when would Goku have had a chance to keep me? Did Vegeta think he would fight with him over me or something? No, that can't be it. He knows Goku too well. That man is loyal. And I am a fool._

Her mind turned to the phone call from Chi-Chi. She'd expected that call some time ago, but all the calls before today had been like nothing had ever happened. _I can't believe Goku never told her. That isn't like him. He was so heartbroken because he'd been unfaithful - and it was really my fault. I doubt Chi-Chi will give that any real thought though. But really, suggesting Vegeta fuck her to make things right?_

He put the fish in the freezer, and approached his wife cautiously. "Chi-Chi? Are you going to hit me again?" He got no answer, although the woman did get extremely stiff. "I… I shouldn't have told Vegeta it was okay for him to have sex with you. I thought it was only fair, because of me and Bulma, but I didn't think about how you would feel about it. I should have known, since you forgave me for that, that I shouldn't have brought it up."

"Forgave you? Forgave you? I JUST FOUND OUT!" Her voice rose until the shrillness cracked the glass in the windows. "I never KNEW what happened with you and Bulma. You fucked that BITCH AND YOU NEVER SAID A WORD ABOUT IT!"

"But… I did!" Goku spread his hands out in supplication. "When I came home. I told you. You said it didn't matter!"

"You did not tell me!" She whirled, brandishing a huge frying pan.

"I did!" Goku cried. "I told you I broke my wedding vows! I told you that. And you said it didn't matter." Tears formed, he held them back. "You forgave me," he whispered as the frying pan crashed against his head again.

Chi-Chi glared at the unconscious mess on the floor. "That's not the part of your vows I thought you were apologizing for."


	8. Headache

His head ached. And moving his hand to his head took more energy than he thought possible. Long fingers carefully investigated the painful spot, came back bloody. He blinked at the blood, his foggy brain trying to connect the dots to let him know what had happened.

He was at home. On his back. In the living room. Why? His stomach rumbled, he wondered if Chi-Chi had…. He sat straight up. "Chi? I'm sorry! Chi?" No answer. He struggled to his feet, using the doorframe to pull himself up, then waited for the room to quit spinning. He'd really made her mad. Really, really mad.

He clung to the frame, carefully sorting through his memories. What there were of them. He knew for sure he'd made his wife mad, but for the life of him, he couldn't remember what it was he'd done. He remembered being hit with the frying pan, more than once. So what he'd done had been very, very bad. But what was it?

Goku frowned, worrying at his bottom lip. He didn't dare ask his wife. If she was that mad at him for whatever it was he'd done, she'd be absolutely incensed if he had to ask her to tell him what it was. Painful experience… he knew he'd had a bad thing whacked out of his head before, and he was fairly certain he'd been out a day or two when he'd had to tell her he didn't know what he'd done to make her mad to start with.

Who could he ask? Would Bulma know? Or Vegeta? No, Vegeta wouldn't know. Vegeta only bothered with him to spar, cutting short any attempts Goku made to pull him into conversation. And, he frowned harder, pressing his hand firmly against his bleeding head, he didn't remember the last time he'd seen Bulma, so she probably wouldn't know either.

Which meant he would have to beat the memory back into his own head. Except… how many memories was it he needed? He lurched across the kitchen, grabbing the back of one of the kitchen chairs, sinking gratefully into it. He frowned. What did he know?

"My name. I know my name. I'm Goku. And my wife is Chi-Chi, and I made her mad. Bulma is my best friend, and Vegeta is my sparring partner. I haven't seen either of them for a long time… I've been staying home a lot, training nearby, going fishing." He blinked. Focused. Thought. "I know how to talk, and walk. I know that I fight, because Vegeta is my sparring partner. And I train to fight." He frowned, noticing the blood running down his arm, making a small pool on the table. His head was still bleeding. "I'm bleeding. And my head hurts."

He pressed harder, grunting in satisfaction when the blood stopped running down his arm. He stared at the small puddle of blood. "I'm hungry. I know that, too!" he exclaimed with an air of accomplishment, then frowned again. His gaze wandered over the kitchen, looking at the various cooking appliances. "I don't know how to cook? No. I don't know how to cook."

His head didn't hurt so much anymore, he got up and made his way into the living room, staring around at all the pictures. "I… huh. These must be of Chi-Chi's friends. No, this one's Vegeta and Bulma. He doesn't look very happy. Oh, that's right. He's never very happy." The smile on Goku's face faded as he stared at the picture. "Vegeta doesn't like me. Why is he my sparring partner? He's always calling me a simple-minded fool." He cocked his head to the side. "I suppose he's right, though. I guess I don't have much of a life outside of eating and training and Chi-Chi.

"That reminds me… I have to apologize to her for something. But first, I think," he dropped to the floor, almost in exactly the same spot he'd woken up, "I'll just take a nap. I'm kinda tired."


	9. Explanation?

Goku didn't feel a whole lot better when he woke up. He just wasn't as tired. He regarded the dried blood on the floor, and decided he'd better clean it up before his wife came home. And wash his gi. It was bloody, too. Goku hunted through the kitchen, finally coming up with a mop and a bucket. "Soap… ah!" He added some dishsoap and bobbled the mop in the water until there were a lot of bubbles. Then he cleaned up the bloody mess and put away the bucket and mop after dumping the water.

He walked down to the stream. Yanking off his gi, he proceeded to wash it as he had years ago as a child, then spread it out in the sun to dry. He was still hungry. And, a swim would wash the blood from his hair and body. Diving into the water, Goku went fishing. Vegeta was on the bank waiting for him when he surfaced, large fish in his hand. "Hi Vegeta!"

Goku waded out of the stream. "You want some fish? I can catch some more if you do."

"No."

"Okay then." Goku ripped off a part of the fish, stuffing it happily in his mouth. He chewed a few times, eyeing Vegeta's scowl, and swallowed hastily. "Um, you don't mind if I eat, do you? I'm really hungry."

"You don't plan to cook it?" Vegeta replied scathingly.

"Cook it?" Goku blinked. "Well, no… I guess I didn't." He regarded the fish thoughtfully. "I… should, I suppose." He ki-fried it, and resumed his meal. But with each bite, his unease grew and his appetite lessened as Vegeta continued to scowl at him. "Is something wrong?"

"Bulma is pregnant."

"She is?! That's great! You'll be a daddy!"

"Will I?" asked the dangerous, silken voice.

"Well, sure!" Goku's excitement dropped. _Something is wrong. Very wrong. Why does Vegeta seem so angry with me? Did I miss our sparring session? And what did he mean? Why wouldn't he be a daddy? He's Bulma's mate, isn't he? _He pulled off another tiny piece of fish, realized his stomach felt so sick he wouldn't be able to eat. _What's wrong with me?_

"You don't think you might be a daddy?" the deadly voice continued.

"What?!" Goku assumed classic Son pose, laughing nervously. "No, Chi-Chi isn't pregnant. I don't think she is anyway. She's mad at me right now, though, so maybe she is and just isn't telling me." The next thing he knew was his head colliding with a series of trees.

He got to his feet slowly, blinking to try and clear his blurry visions. Three… four… three… a man was coming toward him, but there was more than one image of him. He focused on the most solid looking, least flickery one. "I… I'm sorry…" _Who is that? I know him._ "Vegeta." _Why did he hit me? _"Did… you want to… spar?"

He kept from raising his hand to the side of his head. Raw pain screamed at him, his vision continued to be blurry in spite of the blinking. Up was becoming more difficult. _Vegeta… hates weakness. I can't let him know he's hurt me._

"I do not," the three Vegetas informed him.

Now Goku did raise his hand, pressing it to his head quickly, bringing it down to see what he'd thought to find - blood. "Oh." He swayed just a bit, used every bit of control he had to stop. He looked at the ground. "Then why… are you here?"

"Bulma doesn't know who the father is."

_Father? Of what? What's he talking about? Bulma? Oh! The little blue-haired girl who likes to go look for dragonballs. But I don't understand._ Fool that he was, he said so. "I don't understand."

This time, when he staggered to his feet, he fell back to his knees, holding his head. He curled there, half-upright, whimpering just a bit from the pain. Again, the flame-haired silhouette was there.

"What's so hard to understand, baka? You fucked her. She doesn't know if her child is yours or mine." A sneer twisted his expression. "You fucked my wife. I should kill you for that. I don't remember now just why it was I spared you. Maybe I should finish the job this time."

The words washed over him, making little sense. Guileless, pain-filled black eyes looked up at the figure, focusing slightly to one side of it. A bloody hand was extended slightly before returning to clutch at blood-soaked spikes. "Who are you? Why are you hurting me?" A tiny whimper of pain, quickly stifled, escaped as well.

Vegeta stepped forward, determined this time to kill the man. But the pitiful, child-like questions and the whimper that followed made him pause. Especially when he focused on Kakarot's eyes. The sheer bewilderment in them stunned him. "How can you not know?" he demanded angrily. "You cheat on your wife with mine and conveniently _forget_ about it?" He snorted. "I didn't hit you that hard!"

"Wife?" Wide black eyes blinked at him. "What's a wife? Is it good to eat? And why _did_ you hit me?" The younger man got to his feet, his voice suddenly angry instead of confused. "I don't know _who_ you are, but I'm _not_ going to just let you hit me! Saiyans _don't_ just let people knock them around."

"I don't believe this." Vegeta glared at Kakarot, and suddenly smirked. "I am Vegeta, Prince of the Saiyans. You are Kakarot, a low level Saiyan warrior. Does that spark…" He blinked at the man suddenly on one knee before him, head bowed. "… your memory?" he finished lamely. He lost all semblance of haughty pride, gaping in sheer astonishment at the next words the suddenly cowering man spoke.

"I'm sorry, Highness. I shouldn't have said that to you. Please forgive me."

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*examines that. Frowns. Prods muse, points. Muse shrugs, goes back to puzzling over the Inu-Yasha fic. Prods muse hard, points, frowns. Muse takes out cattle prod. Meeps… backs away* Sorry folks. I don't like it, but my muse doesn't seem to get my point. I think he whacked Goku over the head a few too many times here recently. Although… now he has to write himself out of this mess. *Muse looks up, blank horror on his face. Reads. Shrugs nonchalantly.* Apparently, he has a plan. Which, by the way, he is not letting me in on. *Muse looks up, scowls, and points at the sociology book.* But! *pulls out magic muse eraser, holds it over the ideas for Unforgivable* I'm going to go do homework now….. BYE! *Jewel runs off very quickly to do her better half's homework*


	10. Bulma's pregnant

Hi alls. Someone, I forget who, doesn't like the Kakarot gets his memory back scenario. I figure if he got conked enough, he'd remember what he was taught on the trip before he conked his head so hard that first time. I also tried to make it seem as if his memory kinda lost a bit at a time (notice that Bulma became the little blue-haired girl?), so that now all he remembers is what he was taught. Guess I didn't do it quite right, but that was the plan. Eh, oh well.

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"Ka-Kakarot?"

"Highness?"

It took Vegeta a moment to realize what was so completely wrong. "You're speaking Saiyan!"

"Yes, Highness," Kakarot replied. "I learned from the teaching tapes in the pod."

"From the… Kakarot, how old are you?"

"I… I'm not sure. I seem to have failed in my duty?" He made it a question, not even sure he was in the right place, completely uncertain as to what was happening. "Is this the planet I was to purge?"

"It is."

"You… have come to punish me for my failure?"

Vegeta approached him, lightly touching the blood-soaked spikes. "No, Kakarot. This planet is our home now." He sensed the other relax. "What I came to punish you for was taking my mate."

"NO!" Wide, frightened black eyes looked up. "No, I would not… I would not do that!"

Vegeta frowned. "Do not lie. I saw you."

Kakarot seemed to gather himself, standing slowly. He swayed unsteadily, his hand creeping once again to press against the side of his head. "I… do not remember. I came here. I was… picked up. An old man. He took care of me. And then… you hit me." Again, he swayed unsteadily. His free hand moved behind him. "My tail! What's happened to my tail!"

The panic in the other's tone convinced Vegeta that it was not an act. That, and the bright blood that seeped through his fingers to run down his arm. "Come. Your wound needs attention." He turned and lead the way to Kakarot's home.

Kakarot followed him, stumbling over roots and getting smacked by branches his blurred eyesight didn't register. The shorter Saiyan soon made an exasperated noise and hefted him, dangling him as they flew over the trees to the small cabin. Vegeta was forced to carry him inside and lay him on the couch before going to see if the unconscious Saiyan had any senzu in his house. And some clothes. Kakarot had left his laundered gi by the stream.

"How do you feel?"

He blinked at the spiky-haired man, taking stock of himself carefully. Vegeta wouldn't have asked without a reason. "Fine, I think. Why?"

Vegeta answered, he blinked in confusion. "What? I don't understand. Vegeta? Did something happen?"

"I have some questions." Vegeta rattled off several, all dealing with recent events, Goku answering each one promptly. Then he turned to other things, going further back. At last he asked about things Kakarot would have learned on his journey. His eyes dimmed a bit with each question the other couldn't answer. "I see you're back to normal," he said at last. "The senzu must have healed the more recent damage."

"What do you mean?"

"Your wound was severe enough to restore the lessons you were taught in your pod." Vegeta rose from his seat next to the couch and went to the window. "But just now, you were unable to answer anything related to them."

Goku studied the smaller Saiyan. Vegeta's hands were linked together at the small of his back, his face slightly in profile as he gazed out at the trees. He seemed somehow smaller, more fragile, in spite of the latent strength easily seen in toned muscles revealed by skin-tight clothing. Sad? Goku nodded.

"You weren't the only one anymore. Kakarot… he was really here. A true Saiyan, not just by blood, but in history and knowledge, thought and deed," he said quietly. "But the senzu repaired the damage, locked him away again, and left you with me. A brain-damaged Saiyan with no memory of his people, and no real interest in them."

The figure at the window stiffened. "I came to tell you that Bulma is pregnant. She doesn't know if the child is yours or mine."

"WHAT!!!!!"

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Jewel: *examines muse*

Muse: *hides*

Jewel: Anyone have a muse for sale? Mine appears to be defective.


	11. I thought it was good news

Well, all, I finally managed to download my reviews, so I will try and get your questions answered and reply to any comments that demanded such! I only have reviews through chapter 9, though, so that last twist is not reflected in these a/n's.

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Tatoosh: I could do without the yuri in Maintaining, but yeah, that's a good one. There is one… can't think of the name right off-hand, that is from Chi's pov during the 7 year separation - and she loves him to pieces. I dunno why they stay married when she's nasty. Probably because Goku is always seen as so bloody damned loyal - he ain't leaving, he gave his word. Hence, if she's got a problem, she's got to leave. I'm thinking it would be a pride issue with her, she is a Princess, after all… but that's just my opinion. I don't think it matters how much head trauma Goku gets… he's an idiot. An adorable idiot, but still an idiot - relationship wise, that is. Fighting genius… short-lived devotion, but it was nice while it lasted, wasn't it?

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Aikenlicious: Eh? You've a ficcy? Did I miss that? I'll have to track it down, I guess. Been offline longer than I expected. I should hide now, shouldn't I? I let Goku come back…

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Palimino: eep? Okay, okay, he's feral. (funny, I always figured Vegeta as more feral, but fine, have it your way…)

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Afrodite: Thank you! J I can't believe somebody finally can't take sides! I try to make my charries real, even when I'm borrowing them from someone else (bows to the Master of DBZ). Goku does come across as naïve about relationships, at least to me, and I tried to stay true to that without making him too hopelessly stupid. I send Goku from being disorientated to having a shrewd moment. I wonder if that will come back to haunt me?

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July: Chi-Chi is actually hard for me to write, so she winds up being the bad guy a lot. I guess I just don't understand a woman who can live with Goku…

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Passing girl: Chi-Chi thought he meant *blink* Um… I forgot! Crap! I'm not supposed to forget parts of my story! Quick, what are the wedding vows again? Love, honor, cherish… blah blah… cleave only unto (what Goku meant)… oh dear. *is very embarrassed*

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Prince of all Saiyans: (spends a moment slavering, pulls herself together) Chi-Chi can hurt Goku because he does not protect himself from her. Why, I do not know. I think it has something to do with him being so much stronger than her that he figures if she thinks he needs whomped, he should take it. Pure-hearted doesn't equal dead, and he _was_ awfully shook up at the time.

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Raquel Kamikaze: Ah. Okay, criticism. Actually, she wasn't supposed to come across as homicidal. Just extremely pissed. Yep, the kid is Bra.

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Skate1980: Hi Kevin! I already commented on your review last chapter, I just couldn't remember who you were.

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Chris-warren876: I'm updating, I'm updating. I actually had a series of ideas for this story. I like it when Writer's Block finally breaks.

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Jay: (yours being the only review that stuck in my head from chappy 10!) Yeah, short-term Kakarot. A rather nicely disorientated Kakarot to mesh with the previously disorientated Goku. I feel sorry for Vegeta, though… he spent that brief moment as the Prince of his race, and had it snatched away because he took care of his only subject. I've never seen Goku where he ever acted like Vegeta was anything other than an equal… to have finally been treated as the Prince he is and then *poof*… ouch. 

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"But I don't like needles! And I didn't want to have sex with her! I just didn't want to hurt her!" Goku braced himself in the door of the lab, wide eyes fixed on an array of needles waiting beside a chair. "I'm not going in ther… uumph!" He pulled himself to his feet as an angry Vegeta followed his precipitous entry.

"Sit." Vegeta pointed directly at the chair.

"But Vegeta, there's needles!" Goku wailed.

"Sit down, or I will use every last one of them on you instead of just one," Vegeta snarled. Panicky eyes darted between the frightening needles and Vegeta at his scariest. The thought of Vegeta armed with more than one needle decided him, Goku sat. Vegeta promptly fastened the restraints on the chair.

"But why do I have to get stuck? Can't it just be you?"

"Stop that whimpering, you pathetic fool!" Vegeta grabbed one of the needles at random, holding it up before wide eyes. "Unless you want me to shove this up…"

"Vegeta! Put that down!" Bulma entered the room, plucking the needle deftly from her irate mate. "Don't worry about it, Goku, I just need some of your blood."

"Can't you just use Vegeta's?" Goku strained against the restraints until Vegeta grabbed another of the needles and held it to his nose. Then he just sat as straight and still as he could, trying to keep the cold metal point from touching him. He was so fixed on Vegeta's angry gaze that he never even felt the needle Bulma used to draw his blood.

"All done! Your turn, Vegeta."

Vegeta snorted, turning the needle he held into his own arm and drawing his blood for her. "There. Kakarot and I are going to go spar."

"Mmmhmm…" Bulma returned, already busy with her bits and pieces.

"We're gonna spar?"

Vegeta released him, and drug him from the room by his ear, Goku yelping in protest all the way to the GR. And he was so badly shaken by his needling experience that he couldn't provide the prince with any challenge. Vegeta finally threw him out, thoroughly bruised and bloody, and slammed the GR door in his face when he tried to apologize.

Goku stared at the door for a long moment, then turned, shoulders slumping as he realized he'd failed yet another person. He walked slowly back to the lab.

"Oh, Goku! He let you out already?" Bulma looked up from her work. "And the baby's his, not yours."

"That's great!" He smiled. "He'll be happy about that. So will Chi." The smile faded. "As soon as I find her to tell her, that is. Have you… no, you wouldn't have seen her. I guess I'll try her dad's."

"You do that. I have to go tell Vegeta he's going to be a daddy again."

Goku turned, watching her stride down the hall. "I hope he's pleased. I hope… Chi will be, too." His hand snaked to the side of his head, throbbing where Vegeta had kicked him. "She wasn't too happy awhile ago. She had her frying pan out again."

He headed out of Capsule Corp, sending an uncertain glance back over his shoulder. He wasn't really sure how this new development would affect his long-time friendship with Bulma, or the grudging friendship he'd finally won from the prince. Especially since, if only for a moment, he'd actually been Kakarot! His smile was weak when he realized his prediction to his wife had finally come true - she really had hit him hard enough for his memories to come back. Maybe it would be best to stay away for awhile.

That decision made, he floated a moment, extending his senses to find his wife's ki where he'd expected to - at her father's. Heart-sick, but also glad that he would be able to tell her the baby wasn't his, he flew there He used the extra time gained by not using the IT to try and get his still-jumbled thoughts together so that this time, he'd say everything right. The Ox-King had really big frying pans, and he didn't think that Chi-Chi wouldn't use one if he screwed up.

"Hey, Chi, everything's fine! The baby isn't mine!" he sang as soon as he landed beside her. Both hands clapped over his mouth as he realized what he'd said had nothing at all in common with his ever-so-carefully rehearsed speech. His eyes widened dramatically, his feet carrying him backwards too slowly. He hit the ground and bounced.

He laid where he'd fallen, remembering the words he'd meant to say. They spilled quietly from his lips as he drug himself to a sitting position, leaning his head against his knees, waiting for the dizziness to pass. "Chi-Chi, I'm sorry I didn't explain when I said I broke my vows. When you forgave me so quickly, I was so happy, because I'd thought you were going to hate me. I hadn't meant to do what I did… I don't even know why I did. Have you forgiven me for being so stupid? For failing you so badly?"

Goku looked up slowly, realized his wife had left. He dropped his head back, wistfully reciting the words he'd meant to say. "Vegeta beat me for it, then gave me a senzu. I thought he'd come for you, because that would have been fair. I realized it wasn't fair when you hit me. But I didn't know you hadn't understood me, that you hadn't known that I had sex with someone else. Not until you said I hadn't told you, and hit me again.

"You finally hit me hard enough for my memories to come back." He looked up, then laid himself out on the tiles again. He sighed, remembering what Vegeta had said. "I almost wish Vegeta hadn't healed me. But he did. And then he took me to Bulma and poked me with needles so he could be sure his baby wasn't mine. And it wasn't. I thought that was good news… I guess I was wrong. Because I screwed up and said it all wrong. I guess you were right all along… I'm not a good enough husband for you."

---------------------------------

And on that demoralizing note, I shall leave you. I have to go pound on my muse and see if he'll tell me if Chi-Chi was within hearing distance! And if it did any good if she was.


	12. Forgiven

He stayed on the tiles a long time. How long, he never was sure, but the sun had set by the time he finally got to his feet again. His wife had never come back. He poked about the kitchen a minute, finding the pad and pencil for the grocery list, and wrote the words he had meant to say. He paused a few minutes, indecision clearly written on his face. He added one more line.

Goku dropped pad and pencil on the large table, and carefully removed the dent from the skillet. Then he walked away. He didn't hurry, he didn't take shortcuts. When he finally arrived at his little home, he packed up only what truly belonged to him. He touched nothing that belonged even partly to Chi-Chi. It didn't make for much of a bundle - his clothes, the wallet he never used except for putting pictures in, and the four-star ball. He gathered it up and set out.

He didn't go far, just to his favorite fishing hole. He had a camp set up within fifteen minutes, a lap-sized fish within a half-hour. He ate it mechanically, not really tasting it, and turned in as soon as it was gone. He caught another fish just after sun-up to have for breakfast, then set to doing his usual daily exercises. But each time a twig snapped, he broke from the exercises to look hopefully in the direction of the sound.

It became a routine. Catch fish, eat fish, exercise. Stop exercise to check on sound. Continue exercise. Catch fish for lunch. More exercise. Catch fish for supper. More exercise. And always, always, stop when a twig snapped, or something out of the ordinary was heard, to see if… he had been forgiven yet.

The hope he'd held faded bit by bit as the days passed, his attention to snapping twigs and other noises slowly dropping off. At last, his hope was gone, and he never turned to see what had made the noises. He hunted for berries, fruits, and other edibles when he finally got tired of nothing but fish, and never noticed when the fish he caught became smaller because his appetite had decreased.

The day he surfaced with his latest catch to find Chi-Chi waiting on the shore, he didn't know what to do. Slowly, he left the water, spitting the fish before grabbing up a semi-clean _gi_ to put on. He dressed in silence, uncertain, waiting.

"You can come home."

His voice was rusty with disuse. "I'm… forgiven?"

"I said you could come home didn't I?"

He nodded, and packed his things, following her quietly home, listening as she talked. Bulma had had a little girl, they'd named her Bra. She'd had another gathering, Chi-Chi had gone, cooed over the baby, made peace with Bulma, and left. Goten had started dating, and wasn't telling her anything about the girls. Pan was walking, had just gotten her fifth tooth, and could say Grandma.

"Who's Pan?"

"Your granddaughter. She's just turned a year old." Chi-Chi continued to talk.

_I have a granddaughter. A year-old granddaughter. No one… told me? No one tried to find me to tell me?_ His spirits, which had risen somewhat, plummeted. _My oldest son has a daughter and my youngest is old enough to date. How… how long?_

They came out of the forest at edge of the clearing their house sat on. Another house was next to it now. He saw the tiny child toddling in the yard, realized with a pang it had to be the granddaughter. The house must be Gohan's. He'd been so close all this time, and his son hadn't bothered to come and tell him about his daughter. He recognized the woman in the yard, Videl. So, the two were still together. Yes, Chi-Chi was telling him about their wedding now. Another thing he'd missed…

His head drooped lower and lower, sinking right along with his spirits. The casual, "Oh, hey Dad, how are you?" from his eldest he answered with a brief wave, unable to speak. His younger son glanced up from a dish of ice-cream, didn't even say hi. He dropped the bundle of dirty clothes in the laundry room, continued up the stairs to take a shower under his wife's urging.

Unseen tears leaked from his eyes. He'd missed so much. Yes, he'd thought it best to stay away from Vegeta and his little family, but he hadn't really thought his own would avoid him. Chi-Chi, yes, until she was through being mad at him. But Gohan? And Goten? His boys loved fishing. They both knew his favorite fishing hole. They could both sense chi. So why had they not come?

He lathered himself slowly, making sure to get every bit of his hide, shampooed his hair. Twice, to be sure there would be no complaints. He wrapped a towel loosely around his waist, went to his room, pulled on the clothes that were laid out. Not his beloved orange… but they were all dirty. He pulled the pants on, belted the blue shirt around his waist.

Then, he went downstairs to become reacquainted with his family.

The end

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Jewel: *examines H. Muse*

H. Muse: *shrugs*

Jewel: *waits*

H. Muse: *starts looking nervous*

Jewel: *is still waiting*

H. Muse: It was supposed to be a one-shot!

Jewel: So was Unforgivable.

H. Muse: I hate him.

Jewel: Who?

H. Muse: Muse.

Jewel: *snickers*

H. Muse: *pouts, and goes to look at AT3Y*


	13. Berate H Muse reconsidered

Jewel: There! You see! I told you that sucked!

H. Muse: Huh?

Jewel: *directs everyone's attention to **Kinosei**'s review* Just look at that critique! It's so beautiful! *thumps Kinosei for calling it a flame*

H. Muse: *reads* OOOOOO…. I'm in trouble.

Jewel: *looks expectant*

H. Muse: *looks at the rest of chapter 12's reviews*

Jewel: *waiting*

H. Muse: You expect me to redo it, don't you?

Jewel: Oh, yes.

H. Muse: But I wanna do AT3Y!

Jewel: Muse can handle more than one story at a time.

H. Muse: I hate him.

Jewel: Okay, how about this: You fix it, or I give you back to him.

H. Muse: … oh, fine. I'll fix it. *sits down to scribble*

-------------------------------------------------------------

Chi-Chi leaned back against the wall, fuming. How dare that man pull a stunt like that! "It's okay, the baby's not mine???!" she hissed. The man was talking again, she moved quickly out of hearing range, not wanting to hear any more of the excuses she'd listened to her entire married life. Not for the first time, she wondered if reminding him he'd promised to marry her was such a good idea.

Then she shook her head, the tiniest smile playing on her lips. Goku was sweet, though… USUALLY. But the recent events… well… those weren't so sweet. "I'll… talk to him once I've calmed down," she decided finally, "but I'd better stay away from the kitchen until then. Otherwise…" Ruefully, she thought of the freshly-dented skillet, and sighed.

She walked quickly away from the kitchen, headed outside. The garden needed weeded, and taking her frustration out on the weeds was just what she needed. She settled to work grimly, pulling and hoeing weeds until it was too dark for her to see. Then she went back to her interrupted dinner preparations.

The skillet, minus the dent, sat on the table. Chi-Chi picked it up, examined it. "I wonder if that was supposed to be an apology?" It was then she noticed the pad. She picked it up, glancing at the design on the top sheet before ripping it off and tossing it in the trash. Just as quickly, she dug it back out, her eyes zeroing in on the uncertain characters at the bottom of the sheet. "I'll be at the fishing hole?"

She frowned, trying to figure out what that meant. Her musings were interrupted when her father arrived, looking for his supper.

Compliments of her car running out of fuel half-way home, Chi-Chi didn't arrive back at the house until late the next evening. She fixed supper for Goten, expecting Goku to come running through the door as soon as he smelled food. He didn't. She put the leftovers in the fridge, then started looking for him.

_He's gone?_ She stared blankly at the empty space where his _gis_ had hung. "The fishing hole? He's gone fishing with all his clothes?"

Puzzled, she began a more thorough search. It didn't take her long to discover that only his things were gone. Nothing of theirs, nothing of their children's. Just his. And of his clothes, he'd taken only the _gis_ he'd made himself. Everything she'd bought for him was still where it belonged.

She sank onto the bed. "Sequence of events… sequence… okay…. Wait a minute! Did he mean he was moving to the… THAT RAT!" It made perfect sense. He'd left his family, again. _Well, this time, I'm not going after him. He can just fish to his little heart's content. It's not like he hasn't done this before. But this time, I'll… make do. Just like I did when he was dead._

A tear slipped down her cheek. _He's gone so much the boys probably won't even miss him_. Wiping her cheeks, Chi-Chi hurried downstairs to do the supper dishes.

---------------------------------------------

H. Muse: There, does that help?

Jewel: *examines it*

H. Muse: *hands Jewel her crown*

Jewel: Oh, that's right. I am the queen of short chapters.


	14. Routine Realization

H. Muse: Hello. Apparently, I'm not supposed to come out and chat anymore. So I'm just here to explain that what I'm trying to do is get Chi-Chi's side, from the time Goku told her it wasn't his kid, to the time she told him he could come home. I'm really sorry that I ended it so badly, Kinosei was very right that I built it up and screwed everyone over. The story will still end at the same point, but it should make a little more sense. *looks hopeful* Oh, and the note Goku left? Please reread this: _She picked it up, glancing at the design on the top sheet before ripping it off and tossing it in the trash. Just as quickly, she dug it back out, her eyes zeroing in on the uncertain characters at the bottom_. Do you understand now? *frying pan hits his head* OWWWWW! *runs away*

-------------------------------------------------------------

Her regular routine was always busy. She cut down a little on how much food she made, but that wasn't a change that gave her any extra time. Dishes still had to be washed, clothes washed and mended, firewood collected, garden weeded. She still had to make her handicrafts, because selling those was still what paid the bills. The house still needed to be cleaned, the yard tended, firewood cut, and her sons raised.

And once again, she was doing it on her own. That note had been the last communication she'd had from her husband. She fished, of course, it was necessary with appetites like her sons. But she never saw Goku. And as she'd half feared, her sons thought nothing of his absence. They'd merely expressed disappointment at not getting to go fishing with him.

It was at night that she missed him. Nights, the only time the two of them had ever really had for each other. The time that wasn't broken by the need to do chores, train, teach. Time just to relax and be together. But that first week, she was too tired to do more than wish he was there. By the end of the second week, she'd gotten back into the single mother routine. And by the end of the third, she didn't care where he was. She was too angry.

"I'll be at the fishing hole. I've been to the fishing hole! He's not there! I've been to every fishing hole nearby! He's not at any of them." She stabbed her needle through the dress she was fixing. A pile of small orange _gis_ sat next to her, each with a rip or tear. She finished stitching the button back on the dress, picked up the first. Ripped out knees. She started patching.

"You'd think if he wanted me to get him, he'd be at the fishing hole. Well, maybe he left. That's not necessarily a bad thing. It's not like… not like he was ever around much anyway. It's not the first time he's left me, after all. And stayed gone when he could have come back."

A door slammed. "Hey, Mom! Where's Dad?"

Goten bounded into the room, one hand behind his back, bouncing anxiously in front of her. "I've got something to show him!"

"I'm sorry, Goten, but your father is fishing."

The sparkle faded from his eyes, the bouncing stopped. "Oh. And… he went alone?"

"Yes."

"Oh." The boy turned, and she caught a glimpse of the small rabbit. "I'll just go turn the bunny loose then."

She watched him go, shoulders slumped, feet dragging. Her heart constricted - this child missed his father. She told them he'd gone fishing each time they'd asked where their father was. Gohan, busy with his high school studies and Videl, hadn't asked often. Goten, though, found something to show his father every day. And every day, Goku was fishing.

She didn't even know if it was true or not. Chi-Chi laid the sewing aside. "Goten? Would you like to go see Trunks?"

"Can I, Mom? I'll be really careful!" He bounced eagerly, hopping from one foot to the other while she decided whether or not to let him go alone. "I'll take Nimbus, okay?"

"All right, Goten. But you be back by dark."

"THANKS!" He leapt up, hugging her so hard she couldn't breath, then called for the cloud at the top of his lungs. Hopping aboard, he hovered just long enough to say, "And tell Daddy that I want to train with him tomorrow, okay?" Then he was gone.

Chi-Chi went back into the house, returning with a small capsule. It POOMPHed to become a small airbike. She spent the next several hours visiting every fishing hole in the area, searching for her husband. She returned home barely in time to get supper ready before Goten returned home, vibrant from his visit to his best friend.

A vibrancy that died before her eyes when she told him that she hadn't been able to talk to his father about training because he hadn't come home. Goten stayed home the next day, helping with the garden. They weeded and canned the entire afternoon. Goten went out to tend to the firewood while she fixed supper. She set only two places.

"Daddy went away again, didn't he?"

"What?"

"Gohan called and said he was having dinner with Videl. And you only set two places. Daddy left us, didn't he?"

"I… yes." She enfolded him. "He left me a note about going fishing. That's the last I heard from him."

"Doesn't he love us?"

She didn't know what to say.

------------------------------------------------

Jewel: And for those of you who didn't get H. Muse's hint, remember that he had his memory back for a bit? Well, when she conked his head again and bounced him on the tiles, he got one very specific memory back. His original written language - the design at the top of the note. After he'd taken time to think about what else to say, the shaky characters he finished the note with were in hers.


	15. An integrating problem?

glances through reviews Eh? Oh. Um…. H. Muse! Where are you???? goes hunting her muse There you are. This personage would like to know what the Kaky thing had to do with anything and how it will have bearing on the story later? listens Oh, is that what happened? Really? Huh. And you expect me to get that into Chi-Chi's side of things? listens I hate you, you know that? You're such a jerk! Wha? Vegeta? Oh. Good point. I can use him, can't I?

------------------------------

Chi-Chi enlisted Gohan's help the next day, but not until after she'd sent Goten to Trunks. She explained only that Goku had told her he would be at the fishing hole, but she hadn't been able to find him.

"Oh. Well… did he say which fishing hole?"

"No."

"Well…" Gohan scrunched his nose. "Where have you looked." He blinked when she listed over fifty different places, most of which he and his brother had gone fishing with his father. "Wow… and not at any of them. That's odd."

"Yes, Gohan, that's what I thought. Now, do you know where he might be?"

"Uh…" he looked preoccupied for a moment, "no. I can't feel him. That's odd. I should be able to locate his chi…" Gohan turned away, walking outside. He turned in a complete circle, rose into the air, and repeated his performance. "I can't sense him, Mom. He must have gone… off-planet or something. Otherwise, I could tell where he was."

"Off… planet?" she squeaked.

"Sure. He could use his Instant Transmission technique to go anywhere he wanted. Namek, the Kais' planet. He's even gone to Otherworld with that technique to visit the friends he made there. Dad could be anywhere."

"He left me a note to tell me he'd be at a fishing hole that wasn't even on the planet?!!!"

"I guess." Gohan glanced at his watch. "Oh no! I'm late! I'm supposed to pick Videl up in twenty minutes. Bye, Mom, love you, gotta run!" He shot off toward the horizon.

"Off-planet?" Chi-Chi headed toward her kitchen. Chopping vegetables sounded extremely appealing.

He was waiting when the other surfaced, a gleaming fish caught tightly against him. Kakarot hadn't noticed him yet, but would soon.

"Vegeta!" Goku yelped, then dove after the fish he'd inadvertently dropped. "Uh, hi?"

Vegeta waited for him to get to shore. "Kakarot."

The fish dropped again, a short ki-blast ceasing its struggles. The expression on the Saiyan's face amused Vegeta, he looked rather like he'd found the fish in his underpants. Goku's hand moved to the back of his head, an expression of pain crossing his face. A moment later, Kakarot had dropped to one knee. "Highness?"

"Your memories have returned?" Vegeta asked, startled.

"I…" An expression of uncertainty. "No, Highness. I… I don't think so. I remember… the crash. And an old man. Falling. And then a scary woman."

"A scary woman?"

Kakarot proceeded to give him a perfect description of Chi-Chi. Vegeta stifled a laugh, and smirked instead. "You greeted me as Goku always does, and then as a proper Saiyan should. And the woman is your wife."

A look of horror crossed the younger man's face. "What the hell was I thinking?"

Vegeta had to bite his lip to keep from laughing this time. "It's rather common knowledge that you don't think."

Kakarot rose, grabbing and pulling on his pants. He looked at the fish a moment. "Hungry?"

"No."

"Okay." The younger man ripped a piece of flesh from the fish and devoured it. He frowned as he ate, then said, "I seem to have more… knowledge. I know of Bulma, and your son, and my sons. I remember Raditz and Nappa. But it's… fuzzy."

Vegeta moved, appearing behind Kakarot an instant later. He brushed aside the upswept spikes, and examined the scar. "You've been injured again. Perhaps a few more injuries will restore you."

"Restore me to what?" The younger man trembled in his grasp. "The warrior you so despise, or the warrior who failed you?"

"Neither." Vegeta ran his thumb over the scar. "Perhaps instead, you can be restored to the warrior you should be, with all your memories intact."

"Owww! Dammit, Vegeta! What did you do to me?" Goku spun away from the prince. "And what do you mean, the warrior I should be?"

Vegeta growled, then explained what had just occurred rather impatiently. (a/n: for those of you who don't know, everything DBZ after the episode that started this spin-off is considered unhappened, as that's about when Dad cancelled my cable, and I dunno what happened in the story-line!) "So," he concluded, "I think that if you get hit on the back of the head a few more times, your memories may integrate."

"Oh." Goku looked down at the fish in his hand. "EWWW! Raw." He ki-fried it. "I haven't eaten raw fish since I was a little kid."

"I've seen you eat it twice. And what exactly do you think sushi is, anyway?"

"I don't eat sushi."

"There's something you don't eat?" Vegeta mocked. "I'm amazed."

"Why are you here, Vegeta?"

"Bulma insisted that I find out if you were still alive. Goten has practically taken up living with us because you won't go home. I do not approve of the arrangement."

"I left a note for Chi-Chi, before I left. She… she knows where I am." Goku fixed another piece of the fish. "I can't go home until she forgives me for what I did, Vegeta. I won't bother your family, either. I'm staying here until she forgives me."

"And what of your sons?"

"The boys?" Goku frowned, concentrated. "Gohan's with Videl, and Goten's with Trunks."

"You will not go see them?"

"I want to. I want to, Vegeta, but I can't. I…. When I left, I took nothing at all that wasn't completely mine. Even the pictures of the boys, I had to leave, because they were partly hers. What I brought was only what I had been given as gifts, or that I had made myself. The boys… they've always been hers, because I've almost never been there for them."

"Tell me, Kakarot, have you woken unsure of how you've gotten someplace?"

"Huh?" Goku frowned, uncertain as to why Vegeta had chosen to change the topic. "Well, I suppose, yeah, a few times. I woke up in one of the trees about a week ago, and I don't even remember climbing it."

"Suppose I am right about that wound on your head, Kakarot. Suppose that until your memories integrate, you… switch personalities? And suppose that when Chi-Chi does come looking for you, your Saiyan side recognizes her as the scary woman, and takes you out of what he considers dangerous territory?"

"That's ridiculous, Vegeta! Chi-Chi's my wife, and I love her! Even if she does whap me with the frying pan sometimes," he added in a mumble.

"You're a fool, Kakarot."

"You've overstayed your welcome, Vegeta."

"Hn. Very well, Kakarot. I'll see you when your wife has forgiven you." Vegeta shot into the air, then set a course for Capsule Corporation. His wife would be wanting to know that Kakarot was as big a fool as always.

"Chi-Chi! I… I wasn't really sure you would come!" Bulma greeted the woman.

"I wasn't sure I would," Chi-Chi replied coldly, "but Goten wanted me to see something he's been working on with Trunks."

"Oh, I see." Bulma worried her lip for a moment. "They've been decorating the nursery."

"Oh, yes. Goku was rather pleased the child wasn't his." Chi-Chi was rather pleased with the flush she'd caused with her scorn. "Although he could have chosen a better way of informing me."

"The nursery's this way." Bulma led the way, a bit stiffly. When her irritation had died down some, she began talking again. "The boys have worked hard on the nursery. They wanted it to be perfect for Bra."

"You named her Bra?" Chi-Chi asked, startled. "Whatever did Vegeta say?"

"Thank the gods that I am no child of yours." Chi-Chi giggled at Bulma's imitation of her husband. Encouraged, Bulma continued, "And then he fell in love. She looks just like me. I had the worst time getting him to hold Trunks, but he just coos over Bra. I guess being dead really made him realize how much he missed with Trunks."

"It was the fight with Buu, woman. And take this squalling brat. It stinks." Vegeta deposited a screaming baby in Bulma's arms the instant she walked through the nursery door, and promptly vanished.

"Vege…! Oh, bother that man! He won't ever change a diaper!" Bulma crossed quickly to the changing table, and soon had one of Bra's problems taken care of. "Here, would you hold her while I fix a bottle?"

"Certainly." Chi-Chi took the baby to the rocking chair, cooing at her, then rather absently took the bottle Bulma handed her and began feeding the infant.

"Look, about Goku. What I did to him was really a shitty thing to do. I just… he was so upset that day, and I just wanted to help him feel better. I never actually meant to take it as far as I did. I love my husband."

Trapped by the baby she was feeding, Chi-Chi glared up at the older woman. "Well, you certainly couldn't have proven that to me!"

"This from the woman who sent her husband to me with a message to send mine to her?" Bulma scoffed. "You aren't the innocent party here, Chi-Chi. Goku is."

"He had sex with you!" Bra began to fuss, Chi-Chi lowered her voice, juggling the baby until she quieted again. "He cheated on me!"

"What did you expect? You threw him out, told him he wasn't worth keeping! Do you have any idea how long it took for me to get him to stop crying? Yes, crying! And when I finally had him calmed down, he went back and you stabbed him! He finally recovered from that, and wouldn't stop saying that he was a worthless failure. I kissed him to shut him up, and the next thing I knew…" Bulma shrugged. "Vegeta beat the holy hell out of him, afterwards, but you broke his heart."

Chi-Chi just stared at Bulma. After some time, she blinked, then looked down at Bra. "I never thought about it. Good gods, what have I done?!"

"I sent Vegeta to make sure he was okay. He told Vegeta he wasn't going home until you came and told him he was forgiven. And that he wouldn't even visit the boys because they were yours - because he'd never been there for him."

Chi-Chi began sobbing. "But I went… and he wasn't there. He isn't anywhere! The boys don't know where he is and neither do I!"

"He eats an awful lot, Chi-Chi. Maybe he's having to move from one fishing hole to another in order to have enough to eat?"

"I'm so sorry Bulma. I shouldn't have blamed you." Chi-Chi rose, and handed over the baby. "Excuse me, but I really must go find my husband."


	16. Goodbye, Kakarot

"It seems you are here."

"My prince!"

"Kakarot?"

"Yes?"

"Oh, get up. That woman's been here repeatedly looking for you, and swears you haven't been here."

A small grin. "I hide. She doesn't look very hard. Never looks up."

"Kakarot, you are not to hide the next time she comes. And if I find out you did, I'll knock you into next week."

Kakarot gulped. "But… she's…"

"Your wife. And you will go back to her, Kakarot. You will not hide from her again. Do I make myself clear?"

Kakarot muttered something uncomplimentary about his wife in Saiyan, then sighed. "Yes, my prince. Do I really have to?"

Vegeta knocked him through the trees. "Stupid baka. Even as a Saiyan, you're a stupid baka!" He waited impatiently for Kakarot to get back to his feet, then frowned. It had always taken more than one blow to down the younger man. Cautiously, he approached the younger, expecting a feint, then began swearing.

He hauled the other to a sitting position, and carefully wiped away the blood from the back of his head, then cursed some more. "It cannot be possible. It just can't. As many times as I've tried to break your skull, or sent you sailing through mountains and whatnot…. Dammit, Kakarot!"

It took him twenty minutes to pry the piece of broken glass from the overly-wounded spot on the back of the other man's head. He shoved a senzu into the unconscious man's mouth, waited only long enough to confirm that the wound was healed, and then left. He knew what the result would be, knew he would refuse to go back to check on the other. Knew that he would never speak to Kakarot again, that Kakarot was gone now, forever. And he refused to acknowledge the tears that flowed at the thought of being alone again. A few words of his native language slipped from his tongue as he sent Kakarot's spirit to the Warrior's fields. Only Goku remained.

He paused, hanging in the air for only a moment. "Goodbye, Kakarot. But I shall remember… if only in name."

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Jewel: contemplates Hmm…

H. Muse: What????

Jewel: Well, I suppose it explains why she couldn't find him…

H. Muse: You do remember this was supposed to be a one-shot?

Jewel: So? _Unforgivable_ wound up with 56 chapters.

H. Muse: Yes, and Muse also made you write _The Game_.

Jewel: shuddering Oh, thank you for reminding me!

H. Muse: No problem. But I will apologize to the readers.

Jewel: You will???!

H. Muse: Well, this story may only have 16 chapters, but it's got nearly half the number of reviews. _It_ gets lots of reviews. Which means people are interested. Which means I really do have to apologize.

H. Muse: turns to the readers

H. Muse: This may not be the final chapter. But I am having a horrible time musing it at the moment. I had meant it as a one-shot, but I was hoping to be able to continue it well once I continued. I've already had one horrible ending spot, and I hate to think I might be doing that again. It doesn't seem right to end the story here, I think there needs to be more of Chi-Chi's search, but I have been without muse-feed for so long that I simply can't function well.

Jewel: Hey, did you just blame this on me?

H. Muse: Er, no. I don't think so. Your TV/VCR died, remember? I can't watch the recording for the inspiration now.

Jewel: Oh, right. adds buy new TV & VCR to the to-do list That reminds me, are you responsible for _Goten's Bunny_?

H. Muse: Oh, no! You are not blaming that one on me! Check your plot bunny supplier. I'm normal.

Jewel: eyes him Bulma and Goku are normal?

H. Muse: Oh, yes. And possibly Bra and Yamcha, although there's a bit of an age gap.

Jewel: falls flat on her face .' I never should have read that story…

H. Muse: But it was good! I like the idea of Chi-Chi with Raditz too, I just haven't.. urmph!

Jewel: has gagged H. Muse Um, yeah. What he's trying to say is that until certain technical difficulties are resolved, he's not going to be working on much of anything.

Raditz: Thank the gods.


	17. resolution

Chi-Chi didn't have the time she'd planned for finding her missing husband. Goten hadn't been home when she'd arrived, and still wasn't home by the time she'd gathered up a few things to go husband-hunting.. She spent the next three days trying to locate her son instead of her husband. Grounded him when she finally found him and had to stay home to make sure _he_ stayed home.

Videl had a miscarriage, and Chi-Chi had to help her cope with that. She spent nearly a year keeping up two homes, since Videl sank into such a deep depression. She asked Gohan to look for him instead, but her son kept telling her that he couldn't feel his father's chi, and that he must still be off-planet. The next year, planning the wedding, helped Videl recover.

Chi-Chi went back to her periodic searches, often with Goten in tow, when he told her Gohan had the chi-sensing skills of a drunken aardvark. He claimed he couldn't find his father's chi because his sensing skills were about as good as a platypus' sex life. She made him write a research paper on the reproductive cycle of the platypus.

The one and only time she asked Vegeta to help her find Goku, he told her to look up, and not bother him. She'd climbed up on the roof, and then borrowed Bulma's telescope for the next several weeks, trying to visually spot the planet her elder son was certain his father was on. When she finally conceded that it was unlikely she would be able to find him that way, she went home.

She spent the next three years hunting down the dragonballs so she could wish her wayward husband home in between taking care of her house, her younger son, her elder son, her daughter-in-law, and the million and one other things like her new granddaughter and idiots who stole the dragon balls she collected. When she finally did get them all collected, the dragon told her he couldn't grant her wish. She beaned it with a skillet.

It dropped her in a lake. There were vague signs of a camp at the area where she finally splashed ashore, so she built up the fire, skinned out of her dress, wrung it out, and hung it to dry. Then she spent another half-year hunting the dragon balls. Her first wish to the scaly irritant was for her larder to be full, since she was certain Goku would be tired of fish. The second was to be taken to her husband.

The damn thing dropped her in a lake again. This time, just after she finished redressing, her husband popped out of the lake with a fish.

She took him home and made him shower while she fixed him a feast. "I'm real sorry, Chi," he whispered when he came back to the kitchen. "I… never meant to make everyone so mad."

"Nobody could find you. Gohan couldn't sense your chi. We thought you went fishing off-planet."

"Huh? But… I left… didn't I leave a note?"

"This?" She handed him a well-worn, often folded, very soft scrap of old paper. He unfolded it carefully.

"That's a pretty design. But I wrote out a big apology before I wrote I'd be at the fishing hole. I really expected you'd… forgive me sooner. I didn't mean to be a bad husband, Chi, really!"

"I -"

"You were a pretty piss-poor father, too," Goten pointed out sullenly. "Why'd you hide your chi from us if you wanted Mom to find you, anyway?"

"Goten!"

"No… no, he's right. I owe him an explanation." Goku drew a deep breath, and moved to take a seat at the table. "The only things I took with me were the things that were just mine. Anything that I shared with your mother, I left behind. She deserved to have it all more than I did, because I'd been such a bad husband.

"I already knew I wasn't a very good father. I spent too much time being dead to know how to be a father. You were more hers than mine, and she wasn't mad at you, just me. It would have been wrong for me to take you with me, and even more wrong to come back before she told me I was forgiven. It would have been like… trying to sneak a card out of the deck on her turn."

"What?"

"Master Roshi taught me that," Goku explained proudly. "It's cheating. But… I wasn't hiding my chi, and I never left the fishing hole until I had almost fished it out."

"We went looking for you!" Goten spat. "You weren't there. You weren't ever there!"

Goku frowned. "Did you ever stay very long? If I was fishing, and underwater, my chi would have been a lot more contained. Sometimes I had to stay under a really long time to catch a good fish. I did this little glowy thing with my chi to attract the biggest fish that lived down on the bottom, and I had to be real still and quiet."

Goten shook his head. "You're an idiot."

Goku grinned a little shakily. "I guess nothing's changed, then."

"Behave, Goten. Here, Goku. I made your favorites."

Goten didn't come around for several weeks, until after he punched his father through a mountain a few times. Gohan came over to show off his wife and daughter and cheerfully asked about his trip, now that his dad was back on the planet. No one bothered to correct him. Goku told him the fishing had been pretty good.

Chi-Chi was just happy to have her family back together, and made a silent vow not to make any more stupid suggestions.

************a**********b****************c

H. Muse: *examines thoughtfully*

Jewel: Well, it does end at the same place.

H. Muse: I almost want to expand the Goten thing.

Jewel: No. It took you too long to write the final chapter as is.

H. Muse: It just doesn't seem very "Happily ever after"

Jewel: Idiot, this is DBZ. He's going to leave her for six hundred and eighty gazillion other things anyway, including the dragon she bonked with a skillet.

H. Muse: I do hope you aren't planning to write about that.

Jewel: ? ! *beans H. Muse with a skillet* Sick little bastard…


End file.
